This past weekend was the two year marker of when I found out about my WS affair(s). That day was followed with 18 months of many more affairs and OW. (4 OW total that I know of.)

I barely reflected over the weekend and I really am only posting now to say that your inner self CAN heal. It is a long process and I even now have my ups and downs, but it is possible and it is happening within me. (Thank goodness!)

The old saying... Time heals all wounds - I do believe that can certainly be true.

Well wishes to all and CHEERS to me!

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

I'll write more later, but am rushing out to golf. I just wanted to be the first to say:


Peace is not just the absence of war; it's an exercise in compassion. -Dalai Lama
Coming to you from JJ

Edited because the first picture was WAY too big!

Next weekend will be 3 years for me. I am continueing my traditions of taking a day for myself. I am going off with girlfriends for a girls-only weekend. I usually have too much fun to spend anytime thinking about the A's but I try to spend a little time alone to contimplate what it means in my life now.

Trinity

Has it been two years?? My goodness girl, you have come so far!! And that you are healing is very encouraging! I rememember when we would talk on the phone late night scheming how we could help eachother, Nancy Drew work and all. Aren't you glad you are done with that madness!! I am glad for you Coral.

Many hugs.

Hopearoo

Oh thanks Jan, Hope and Trinity.

Golf JJ? And you didn't include me? I actually golfed all weekend. It was great, but I still stink! And no, I wasn't eating Beanie Weanies! I actually stunk at golf.

Hope - We were so Nancy Drew, Inspector Gadget, 007, Agent 99, Ace Ventura and a bit Green Lantern combined! Oh, the days. Miss you, don't miss them!

Trinity - well wishes to you and cheers to you as well. 3 years!!!

Thanks you all.

Coral



"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

Hello Coral

It is always great to see you post. Two years? Wow, and look how far you've come

~ CAL
"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection" ~ Buddha

Cal,

Thank you for the post. I cant believe that it has been 2 years. Amazing how time flies.

Fortunately and unfortunately I have learned a lot in the past two years. Probably the most about myself and secondly about infidelity. It amazes me the things that people will give up to indulge in infidelity or any vice to be fair. I have my own personal demons and have hurt people in the past (Haven't we all?), but I have and would never put anyone through the repeated pain that my WS did to me. A repeat offender, I have learned, is hard to rehabilitate. There is hope, but it is much more difficult than most of us could imagine. I never say "never," but wheeeew, I may have to change my tune on that in the future as well.

I hope you are doing well. I read your posts and my heart aches.

Be well!

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

> A repeat offender, I have learned, is hard to rehabilitate.

It all comes down to the individual involved and how 'head strong' they are about their innocence. If they recognize their guilt and then take responsibility for cleaning up their mess, you're probably looking at a truly reformed betrayer. On the other hand, people that don't admit to doing wrong or who won't take responsibility for cleaning up the mess they've created are less likely to make lasting changes.

After all, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.

My wife spent a long time being sorry for what she did and pledging to clean it up, but at the same time she kept holding on to the idea that she was a victim in the affair. She thought it was the OM who took advantage of her platonic kindness, and manipulated her into being part of the affair. While the OM certainly was one to press for the affair to continue when my wife tried to end it, and he initiated sexual activity and pressured her when she was reluctant, she also contributed significantly to making the affair relationship grow by contacting him, flirting with him, going on dates, and helping to create time for them to be alone together. It was only after that she took responsibility for her role in the affair and then took responsibility for dealing with the consequences to our relationship that we were able to make real progress in reconciliation.

TomJ

Hey Coral,

Thanks for the update. I'm glad to hear you are doing so well!

Happy fairy hugs,

fairyfriend

<<After all, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.>>

But you can make him awfully thirsty


~ CAL
"You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection" ~ Buddha

Thanks folks for all your kind words.

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."

Coral,

I also want to say a big CHEER"s to you..

((((hugs))))

Pat

"Time is precious, but truth is more precious than time."

Thanks Pat and to you as well.

Coral

"A discovery is said to be an accident meeting a prepared mind."