Years ago I was once with this guy (ok, so I'm gay), and I noticed that he could pull his foreskin all the way back and expose the head. I was just very shocked... could NOT believe it. Though I didn't think that I had any problem.

Until recently my new (now ex) boyfriend starts hinting to me about my cleaning methods... and I say to him.. well, how am I supposed to clean it? And he starts telling me about how my foreskin should retract and I should use body soap to clean the head because a bar of soap will dry out the oils (which seems very Elizabethan to me, but ok, I can believe it).

Well, I watched him retract his foreskin, and he has a go at mine.. and very slowly it could retract all the way back. (I had my toes curled up while this was happening... there was little to no pain .. just a general feeling of unfamiliarity...)

So I've been trying it tonight... and I can do it now, and the foreskin settles back and the head just stays exposed, without the assistance of my hands. So, all is good there. But I definitely cannot easily glide the foreskin back and forth... and fear getting an erection while the foreskin is pulled down.

What exercises do you recommend? And what's the best method for cleaning? It's all very sensitive and new to me... (I'm 23 now... I know.. i slow starter)

I was thinking I should pull the foreskin back every time that I urinate?
And maybe at home, pull it back 3-5 times a day for 5 mins?

Do you think these exercises will allow it to easily glide?

Sigh...

Yes, I think the exercises will allow easy gliding. That's what this place is all about.

Cleaning inside is best done only with clear water, no soap of any kind. The problem with soap, beyond drying out the delicate mucous membrane, is that it also kills beneficial bacteria which keep the area healthy. They're like little cops who keep away the bad guys such as infectious bacteria and fungi.

Yes, I recommend retracting when urinating, but you may have an aiming problem with the opening so tight. You might have to wait until things are loosened up. The reason for retracting is simply to keep things loose, nothing more.

I recommend that you do what is illustrated on this page:

http://pages.suddenlink.net/manual_methods/phimosis.html

If it's not possible to get both fingers inside at once, get back to us, and we'll suggest another exercise.

Well, I can definitely get two fingers inside and extend the foreskin laterally. So I will give the exercise a go and hope things pan out.

I tried urinating with the foreskin down this morning, and it was definitely quite different. I was just lucky that I got down on my knees when i was doing it ... otherwise it would have gone out the window. I will have to work on the aiming side of things.

Otherwise, getting the foreskin down, since I've tried it a few times now, isn't as heart-wrenching as it was the first time. Thanks for your help.. it's good to know there is a forum out there like this to help with something that I was very much fretting going to the doctor about. I will keep checking back and let you know how it's going.

All the best,

Will.

I thought I would be able to get two fingers in, but am struggling to do it. I have big hands and foreskin doesn't seem to like to cooperate. Though I did just notice that if I pull the foreskin down a little, thing try prying, it makes it a little easier. It doesn't look exactly like the picture, but I think I get enough fingers in to stretch.

I was also wondering how I should treat the sensitization? I read in a post about using water pressure from the shower to desensitize the head by promoting keratinocyte formation.. but I can't remember it completely. Since I can pull the foreskin back past the head (when flaccid), should I be doing this side by side with the exercises? I feel very similar to "Bob", who is also posting... where the foreskin can go back when flaccid, but bunches up just past the head and definitely doesn't look as consistent as http://www.erectionphotos.com/softHardGallery/GS7-4-02/GSPage5.htm

The glans needs some experience outside it's little cave, so your new practice of retracing while peeing will help. You could also try touching is with a lubed fingers. Eventually it will sort out. Ask you mates about how long it took for them. I don't recommend keeping the foreskin retracted all the time.

With consistant stretching, you'll find that the frenulum can be lengthened. It's responsible for limits of retraction, so if you think you'd like it not to bunch up, work on the frenulum too.

Hi. I'm continuing on with the stretches... it has been slightly easier to pull the foreskin back when flacid. I was wondering how I should feel when stretching? Should it be forceful, but not painful? Anyway, it's probably too soon to see massive results.

I was also wondering about the cleaning again and smells. My head, hmm, seems to have a strong scent, despite me now paying very constant attention to keeping it clean. I probably have cleaned it 4 to 5 times a day just using water for the past few days. I've even used sorbolene while in the shower, but the scent is strong even minutes afterward. I've read (here) that smegma production reduces during ageing. I don't have massive amounts of smegma, but there's a scent that I can detect almost instantly after pulling back the foreskin. Can I expect this to reduce now that the head is getting more exposure to air? The skin doesn't look patchy, red or irritated, and as such I don't think it is a yeast or bacterial infection. Should I worry?

Will.

Gentle tugging is what to strive for. Don't be forceful because nothing is gained by it. The sensation you receive should not be unpleasant.

You're overcleaning. A simple rinse once a day is more than enough. If smegma is present, use your fingers to help it dislodge.

By washing frequently, you stand the risk of removing essential bacteria. They live inside the foreskin to keep it healthy. I have no idea what odor good ones and bad ones have, but I do know the good ones are necessary for good penile hygiene. If you go back to washing just once a day, and there is still a slight odor, that's probably how it's supposed to smell. Has your partner complained about it? How do you feel if you encounter an odor on another man?

Most intact men report that their smegma production decreases as they age. Many younger men also report that with daily rinses, they never see any. Smegma is not dirty, so it shouldn't be feared. Most guys report that when it first appears, there is no offensive odor.

The smegma isn't very abundant, and usually just appears as small white specks around the base of the head, which is easily washed off with water. I've been overwashing because I seem to find these specks regularly. Otherwise the head is usually pink and clean and there seems to be nothing untoward.

Unfortunately I don't have a partner at present, so it's really hard to ask anyone. (Hopefully I'll see my ex soon and I can ask him .. hmm..)

But personally, I'm not too fond of bodily smells in opposed to a clean smell when having relations. This scent can be pungent, strong. It will reach my nose (and i'm a tall guy) as soon as I pull down the foreskin, which makes me question the necessity of its presence. Or course, it's all very new to me, so I am probably simply pressing the panic button. Does anyone else's (here) have a scent?

re: your question about whether or not anybody else on these boards having had similar experiences with scent, i'll weigh in and say mine does as well sometimes. my experience is that it comes and goes based on a whole bunch of factors such as diet, physical activity and sexual activity. i used to find it quite frustrating because, like you, i'm sensitive to smells. i'd go to pee and as soon as i pulled back my foreskin, i could smell it and freak out. i tried cleaning near obsessively to try and get rid of it but was never able. in fact, my experience was exactly as pointed out above, that in fact over-cleaning, especially if you use any kind of soap on it, will actually potentially make things worse.

the thing is, both men's and women's genitals naturally have an odour -- sometimes so slight as to be almost nothing and sometimes as you describe, it can be more pungent. honestly, i wouldn't panic. if your experience ends up being anything like mine, you'll notice it'll more or less go away in a little while and then probably return later and so on. i find if i've been exercising or playing sports a lot, masturbating or having sex frequently or even eating a lot of junk food, that's often when i'll have an odour 'problem'. so if you wanted to you might even try experimenting to see if something like any of those is a factor for you.

at the end of the day, i'd advise just go easy on yourself with all of this and not stress out about it!

after i posted my last, it occurred to me worth mentioning that i'm 24, so more or less at the same age and stage. and when i was at my wits end about odour, in desperation i described my odour problems to a close mate of mine and asked if his opinion on it...to be told that he know exactly what i was talking about, but that he never got too concerned about it. point is this -- chances are, you're probably a lot more normal than you think you are!

Thanks for your reassurances, Rob. Everything is new to me down there, so I'm critical of everything and ready to scrutinize. Ive noticed that the scent does seem to come and go in its severity, but I'm feeling better about myself by knowing more about myself. The more information I read, the more interesting things are. I remember a guy in high school who used to have such a strong scent after he'd urinated that people would scrunch up their nose and make comments. Hopefully he's being more hygenic nowadays.

I am not a very 'scene' (clubs and spreading the love around and such) gay man (I'm 23, so you had my age pegged pretty well), and just want to make sure I get things in order the way they should be down there. Its hard to find people who want to have a relationship, and I dont want to screw it up with trivialities. I really don't have anyone in my life I feel comfortable talking about this stuff with... I almost said something to my pop, but i don't think it's a topic he'd want to discuss.

hey man, i can totally sympathise. for those of us who have foreskin issues, it's all to easy to fixate on what is wrong and get frustrated. for me, i found that half of the battle is the patience and perseverance to stick with stretching and whatnot. the other half of the battle -- and it's no less important -- is getting out of that negative frame and building confidence.

it can be tremendously isolating, or at least i found it to be. and it's not like other problems, where it's easier to talk about with other people. i could never work up the nerve to talk to my dad about this stuff, either. hell, when i had surgery on my frenulum as a teenager i never discussed it with him or, really, anyone else who wasn't a doctor (though, admittedly, in hindsight i wish i had brought it up then with one of my parents...at the very least so i would have had a ride home from the hospital...) and obviously it's not the kind of issue easily brought up with friends and stuff. you never know, though. as i mentioned with the odour issue, it was tear-inducing desperation that drove me to ask one of my closest friends, even though at the time i worried he'd be totally weirded out by the question. luckily, that wasn't the case and i'm glad i did. but if you don't have anyone you think you could talk to, i guess that's one good thing about these boards!

as for either odour or a tightish foreskin, i wouldn't stress over this potentially screwing up a relationship. if they're someone who does care about you, even if it does come at some point i don't see how it would be an issue breaker. for years i worried about that stuff, too, and was, even more, petrified of getting intimate with someone (it also didn't help that most girls i'd encountered back in canada had never encountered a foreskin at all before!) and, to be honest, it took a long time to overcome my fears on that front. but, again (and maybe i was lucky) the girlfriend with whom i first had sex was terrifically supportive and patient, which went a long way to raising my confidence and allowing me to feel more comfortable in my own skin (haha pun fully intended, i suppose!) even though it was an issue for me at the time, it was far from being a deal-breaker in the relationship. so i'd really say, don't stress over it -- if they do make an issue about it, chances are it's not a relationship you want to be in anyways!

it all just takes patience, i think. i mean, hell, i came to this board in the first place because i was having a bit of trouble with my frenulum recently and was looking for some advice on how to stretch it properly, which was frustrating beyond belief because i thought i'd gotten everything with that done and over with. so yeah, setbacks and other issues like odour or whatnot can be frustrating especially when you don't feel can talk to about it. but hopefully these boards will help with that, and it does sound like you're on the right track.