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A Few Questions

May 18 2012 at 10:43 AM
  (Login sharma28)

hi , i just figured out that i have phimosis 2 days back , and i got worried so much that i searched the whole internet . finally i saw this forum, i read a few posts and i got relieved .thanks to all the moderators for such a great work. i have been following the stretching exercises that you have posted and i think its making a difference.
i am 19 and i have found that that their are a few others like me.
i never knew the foreskin could go all the way back. anyway i wont get into personal questions right now , maybe later but i have a few questions i hope you can answer

1) how serious is phimosis on a scale of 1 to 10? if a mild headache is placed on 1 and cancer on 10

2)how much foreskin retraction will be painless for intercourse ? half way down , full or just the head?
P.s. - never had sex , but i think i will after 2-3 months with a condom !

3) my glans are a little whitish red , is that fine ? they are not just red

and last

4) how do you manage to give such good advice ?!! :D

This message has been edited by jimsplacetofixthings on May 18, 2012 3:00 PM

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(Login Paul_B.)

Glad to see ...

May 19 2012, 5:22 AM 

that you have been reading here. I think if you read more discussions - not just a "few" but a lot, you will get an idea of your concerns here. However ...

1} I'd assess so-called "phimosis" - which as you see is a term from which we prefer to steer people away - as rating about commensurate with your mild headache. It's pretty difficult to avoid headaches, so if you get them, there is no single thing you can do to prevent them in the future, whereas if you have a tight foreskin and actually do the stretching, it need never come back as a problem (or if it does, which would necessarily be caused by a problem such as we discuss here, then that can be resolved accordingly). So I call it a quite minor problem.

The big problem is that fellows get unnecessarily alarmed about it, and start thinking about all the things they read, including circumcision. Not surprisingly and quite understandably, that leads to blind panic - when you start talking about circumcision that really is a form of madness. wink.gif

2} The concepts that intercourse might be painful, are based on a faulty model of sexual relationships. Intercourse is not about forcible penetration of the vagina, though reduction of this to an animal act as depicted in pornography might readily suggest it. It need and should not be painful to either partner whether due to a tight hymen or a foreskin that does want to retract, because you should be sufficiently gentle and careful to establish full and adequate lubrication before you even propose to put your penis in.

The two things that might cause pain if lubrication is lacking, are that the foreskin actually does retract over an erection to the point that it almost slips over the glans so that it is put severely "on the stretch" as it is pushed back that last part - a sort of "wedge" effect - or that it will retract but the frænulum is somewhat delicate and all further tension from the foreskin being pushed back further, is conveyed to the frænulum.

Both of these things are relatively easy to assess for yourself. And of course, with a condom (where lubrication on the outside is still critical), it is the condom that takes the "drag" so it is generally no problem at all.

3} The "glans" is a single object (not plural), a Latin term meaning "acorn" because of course, it rather looks like that. Having not been retracted before, it often does look like that, but in the absence of discomfort or irritation (itch), you need not worry about disease. I can best describe it as having different colours like the different areas of your tongue.

4} I think the answer is that we consider this a genuinely important subject that is extremely poorly understood in common parlance, largely due to prudery regarding sexual functions in general. If it were not for the existence of circumcision, this would not actually matter that much, but as I see it, the only way to exterminate the practice of circumcision in civilised society is to educate people to realise that there are simply, no reasons for it to be practiced other than sheer malice.

Now that is a tall order, but something that needs to be done. Making this information (as you describe it, "good advice") publicly available through the amplification of the Internet is the most effective way presently to hand. We leave it to the reader to assess this for him/herself, but I trust that I leave sufficient clues around as to whether and how I know what I am talking about. happy.gif

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Gaurav sharma
(no login)

Hi paul

May 21 2012, 3:31 PM 

Hi paul ! Thanks for your much needed advice !
I will not worry about the colour of my glans now but i would like to ask a few more questions which i hope you can answer

1) if my condom is not a lubricated one or its not lubricated enough , is their any kind of lubrication i can put over the condom ?

2) two fingers do not go inside the foreskin ,so i did the streching by grabbing the outer part of the foreskin that jim illustrates. For how long can i do that ?
I can put one finger inside my foreskin but when i do my foreskin goes/rolls back inside with my finger going in ! Is that normal ,or should i try to keep the tip/opening of the foreskin out while putting my finger in ? Thats difficult for me though

3) what degree of phimosis do i have if my foreskin goes just half way down my glans and my opening being tight as only 1 finger goes in ?

4) and if you have phimosis what are the chances that you have frenulum breve too ?

5) will masturbating effect the streching process or will it do any harm ?

Thanks paul and jim ,you guys are doing a great job here ! If i didnt visit your forum i would have been depressed by the fact that i have phimosis ,as the only option other people give is circumsition ! Which is like cutting off all the trees on earth

I am the guy who made the above post ! Coudnt log into my account ! I think i am forgetting my password
Anyway thank you for ur support guys and everyone else on this forum

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(Login jimsplacetofixthings)
Forum Owner

Take action

May 21 2012, 4:56 PM 

This is about your taking charge and doing it. I sense a great deal of doubt in what you are doing. The idea of the exercises it to put tension on the opening so it gets larger. It's really no more complex than that. If what we advise is not possible, do what you can which will accomplish the same feat until you are able to do it according to advice.

1. Water soluable as directed on the condom package.

2. How long will it take to get two fingers inside? That's how long.

3. There is no scale of measurement. You either retract or you don't.

4. The odds are high that you have both.

5. It will not do harm. Eventually, it might work, but it will take a long time.

Don't worry about logging in.

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(Login sharma28)

Re: Take action

May 22 2012, 3:17 AM 

water soluable as direct on the condom package !? what does that mean ? do you mean water based lube ? i think lubes are not available much here in Delhi , india ! but ill try to find one, whichever you suggest.

and jim thanks for helping out ! i think i have a normal penis with healthy skin and never had any problem with it , masturbating is also fine for me ! so i think i
ts just the tight foreskin i have to take care of !

thanks paul and jim , ill post my progress report in a month !
cheers to you guys :D

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(Login jimsplacetofixthings)
Forum Owner

Original factory equipment

May 22 2012, 7:15 AM 

It sounds to me as if you're really not ready for such activity. However, one thing you should know is that part of the act is the warmup, just as in baseball. A pitcher does not go to the mound until his arm is ready to pitch. It's the same during sex. In this case, the girl isn't ready until she has been warmed up. Natural lubricant will flow when that is accomplished. If you still have questions, the first one should be about your maturity to enter into such activity.

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Gaurav sharma
(no login)


May 22 2012, 12:25 PM 

Haha , yeah jim maybe i am not ready , i knew about the natural lubrication though !
I was just curious to know that if more lubrication is required in the case of tight foreskin !
Very usefull information you are providing here jim ! Ill keep everything in mind

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(Login Paul_B.)

OK, I'm game!

May 22 2012, 5:01 AM 

Here we go:
  1. Lubrication is a tricky matter. You do not need lubrication on the inside of the condom and indeed, lubrication on the inside makes it easier for it to slip off. Then again, you will most likely produce your own lubrication when sexually excited in the presence of a young lady, so this is somewhat inevitable.

    Now optimally she will be sufficiently excited that she is producing plenty of vaginal "wetness" extending out over her vulva - that is essentially, a pre-condition for intercourse. Granted that this is not always the case, a water-based "personal" lubricant sold for the purpose, and as Jim mentions advised on the condom packaging (and generally sold alongside nowadays), to be applied on the outside of the condom (or - inside her wink.gif) needs to be on hand.

    The limitation here, is just how excited she becomes, and remains during intercourse. The most common mythology about sex is that women actually do find penile thrusting sufficiently pleasurable of itself, for them to achieve orgasm. Most do not, and unless simultaneously pleasured in other ways (breasts, kissing, and particularly the clitoris), tend to lose "focus" and correspondingly, lubrication as the act persists.

  2. Pulling the outside of the foreskin opening is nothing but a preliminary to getting first one, then two fingers into the opening. In fact, you need to pull it open and away from the body so that it is "on the stretch" allowing you to get the finger or fingers through the narrow part.

    Yes, it is tricky!

  3. "Moderately tight". On the other hand, because it is not even near retracting, there should be no risk of pain on thrusting (even - conceptually - without a condom!).

  4. Extremely likely - so you should have started on the frænulum stretch already - because the frænulum has not been required to stretch at all before.

  5. Very few fellows masturbate by using any technique that is or becomes painful, so your proprioception should keep you safe. It is asserted that over a period of years, masturbating incorporating retraction serves to stretch the opening (and some chaps use that as the actual form of masturbation), but repetitive brief albeit frequent stretches as masturbation usually involves, are not very effective at stretching.
It turns out you can post just as easily without logging in. A login principally serves to verify that there is only one person posting under that particular name.

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Gaurav sharma
(no login)


May 22 2012, 12:35 PM 

I am not worrying about the lubrication now , you and jim have explained me well about it
What i get from your post is that i should start doing the one finger insertion always till the time i can get my two finger inside !
Ill do that

Okay so my foreskin is moderately tight , so pain while thrusting will hopefully not be their !

And yeah i started frenulum streching from day 1 of starting stretching exercises!

About masturbation ! Great ! I just didnt want some kind of hindrence in my stretching exercises because of it !

Thanks paul , your information keeps me motivated and running !

I found this forum by accident ( i mean not when i was searching tight foreskin related things ) and i am really lucky i did !

Thanks to both of you again ,

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(no login)

hv same problem bt a foul smell too..

June 3 2012, 8:24 AM 

plz tell wot to do,,,,??plz help sir.....i am 18,,

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(Login Paul_B.)

Hold the thought!

June 3 2012, 4:57 PM 

OK, will continue this discussion in the new thread that you have started; it works better that way. I will cross-reference this one for you also.

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