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15 and confirmed this horror a couple days ago.

August 3 2012 at 1:11 PM
  (no login)

 
First off, let me begin by saying, I know it isn't a "horror", however I have been losing sleep over it. The reason why is because I just keep thinking and thinking about it. I'm not going to mention anything about normalcy , because that is not the point. Before I get into my own personal conditions, I'll discuss my worries.
Without pain, I can pull back my foreskin about a third of the way down. But, another problem presents itself. The head itself. When I touch it, it stings. I'm worried about stretching, because of the pain. Is this normal? It's always stung ever since I could remember. I'm worried about health as well. Is what is associated with phimosis true?- The health risks. Or is that another way to persuade you to get circumcised? My last worry is intercourse itself. From what I see, a condom helps. No matter what, my first time would be with a condom anyway, but I'm still worried. I'm scared that I won't enjoy sex. That it will hurt, and make me avoid it. Any help here?
I DO NOT want to get circumcised. I'd rather deal with this problem on my own- but will that hurt [Stretching (I'm reffering to touching the glands)]? Also, I would like to avoid any creams if posible. I don't want to bring this up with my parents. Which leads me to another question, is it genetic? What's the likelihood that my father is/went through the same issue? If it's high, then I may consider bringing it up with him.
I'd also like to point out this. I've done research, and according to most sources, in history, (way way back) phimosis was common. It was the norm. If it's that far back, then I would assume men would be having sex every chance they got, so how in the world would it be painful? I could be wrong, and my sources may be faulty.
Anyways, that's not the point. What do I do next? Do frenulumbreve and phimosis go hand and hand? Again, I'm scared to touch my head, so I'm not confident on the issue. If you need ANY more information, please request it.

 
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Jim
(Login jimsplacetofixthings)
Forum Owner

Relax, you're quite normal

August 3 2012, 8:43 PM 

Hardly an intact boy hasn't encountered pain upon initial retraction. That's just he way it is. The glans has been protected for many years and just hasn't had time to adapt to being uncovered. Time will take care of this. Imagine how terrible it must be for baby boys who have to endure constant contact after being circumcised. It would also be that way for you if you were to submit to it

The good news is that stretching doesn't really involve the glans. You'll be touching the inner and outer surfaces of your foreskin.

Yes, a tight foreskin and a tight frenulum ordinarily go hand in hand. They are part of the same structure. I don't know if it's genetic or not, but I'd vote for that probability. I think it's more closely related to how your family approached the subject. If no one brought it up, there's your root cause. Kids don't always figure these thing out and often adopt unusual methods of masturbation in their igrnoance. Don't fret because it isn't your fault. It is what it is, so now we deal with it. Fair enough?

There are no health risks in not beging able to retract. That's product of prudent societies which teach that sex is dirty. It's really their minds that are tainted. Whatever collects under your foreskin is of no danger. However, some of it can get stinky if left there, so most guys chose to remove it by washing. Washing should be done with clear water and absolutely no soap in any form.

I recommend that you indeed use a condom, leaving your foreskin forward. You should do just fine.

It's up to you if you wish to speak with your father. Some are quite understanding, but be forewarned tht many a boy has been sent off to the operting theater to be circumcised after such a revelation. If you're a minor, your feelings on the matter have no weight.

 
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(no login)

Looks like I'll have a healthy sleep!

August 3 2012, 8:58 PM 

Jim, I've heard excellent things about you and Paul- I believe. This response has made me very happy, and yes, relaxed. I'm still not sure about speaking to my father. My only issue is the fact itself- talking about my penis. As far as circumcision goes? Absolutely not. In fact, that's why I'm uncut, my father is against it.
About how normal am I exactly? At this age should I be retracting fully?
If stretching is necessary, then I have some questions: Ideally, what times of the day could I do it privately and comfortably? What's the best way to avoid odors? Should I be touching the head at anytime? What are the masturbation rules.

Again, I sincerely appreciate what you guys are running here. Truly, thank you!

 
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(Login Paul_B.)

Wow! Questions, questions ...

August 3 2012, 11:59 PM 

If you know that your father is definitely against circumcision, then it should - if it were necessary - be quite possible to talk to him about it, because he is exhibiting a perhaps unusually (in American terms) intelligent and "enlightened" attitude. The awful practice of circumcision can only thrive where ignorance and prudery - being unwilling to discuss things of such vitally obvious importance - are the rule.

I think we can say you are "normal enough"; given that you normally should be able to retract your foreskin with comfort, there are a modest proportion of fellows who share your problem; perhaps a few percent overall.

It is normal to have a sensitive glans. The only reason it is "normal" to have a glans which is not sensitive, is where circumcision is practiced, actually a quite bizarre version of "normalcy". But this illustrates a principle - the glans - as with virtually any other part of the body - "adjusts" its sensitivity both in terms of its structure; the thickness and durability of the skin; and the behaviour of the nerve supply, according to its degree of exposure. So being always exposed by circumcision (or some fellows with a naturally deficient foreskin , or some who deliberately keep the foreskin back) leads to considerable loss of sensitivity. A foreskin retracted only for "business", and that primarily inserted into a well-lubricated vagina, will be quite sensitive, and one never exposed due to a tight foreskin will be just a little too sensitive, though with plenty of lubrication, it should still be comfortable to stroke in a nice soft place.

The best time of day to stretch is very much up to you. While there is some suggestion that being nice and uniformly warm in the bath or shower helps in stretching, it is not essential and I don't think people should waste water on this account. happy.gif

The best way to avoid odours is not to get soap on or inside the foreskin. This is easier to avoid in the shower as you are not soaking in soapy water. Soap irritates the skin, and the production of more "smegma" is part of the skin's response to such irritation. In the shower, you can "funnel" the foreskin (as described in our exercise instructions) and let the water run in.

You do not need to touch the glans, other that with something that is well lubricated. With lubrication you can stroke the glans directly for masturbation; some people like that and others find the foreskin more useful (and less messy) and certainly more convenient.

The more sensitive is your glans, the more uncomfortable will a condom be if your glans is directly exposed to it; again, lubrication is the key (adding a little inside the tip of the condom).

I can see no reason why "phimosis" was historically common, and certainly not normal. Beware of people who claim some "hygienic" basis for the practice of circumcision - this has never been the case, not in wars, not in desert environments (the foreskin would keep sand out and peeing would remove any that got in; if it were otherwise, women would never have survived), not in the tropics. The only reason circumcision has been practiced, is that it is a mutilation that can be performed without rendering the victim entirely sexually inept and thus, infertile. It has always been performed in order to restrict sexual enjoyment and emphasise the social control of the group performing it.

 
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