Need advice - food & pacifers

My baby was on the large size. He is an eating machine. However, this is not aligning to him sleeping more. He is a little over a month old. He has taken to want to suck his hand which I gather is self soothing later on if he can find his thumb. He will use a pacifer but it does not stay in for very long. I have read not to keep putting it back in but I am at odds at how many times is too many times? Especially at 2 in the morning when I am praying for some relief. He was never a huge fan of the pacifer early on, especially at the hospital.

I fear my husband is just placating him with food. Every time he fusses, he wants to run to the bottle. I try to get him to hold off the feedings till more of the 3 hour interval (not in a mean way - And his feedings at this point are 5oz). As, when he interval feeds a couple of ounces here, a couple of ounces there.. it screws up the ebb and flow of the 3 hour interval feeding.

I am reading the secrets of a baby whisper and its messing with my mind. I should know all this stuff by now or so it seems.
He is super alert and I know I don't need to entertain him 24/7 but I am at odds of what to do. Obviously, this won't be the case when I go back to work and he is at day care.

Any advice is greatly appreciated. Sometimes I think reading all these books and all the pro/con stuff out there, made it easier back in the day when you weren't bombarded with all of these negative contations