What are your thoughts on "incompatible" parent-child pairs?

I'm just curious to get your opinion if you have a child that you feel at logger heads with. I don't mean the typical discipline struggles necessarily, which can be of a temporary nature as the child goes through a particular stage, but a situation in which you worry about your relationship with that child.

I had a good friend a few years back who was a lovely person in so many ways and a very dear, respected friend to me. But she had a problem in her relationship with her oldest daughter and it started when the girl was barely out of babyhood. I knew her from before this child was even born. I followed her over the years though we recently lost touch (the daughter is now in college - I have half a mind to contact my friend just to see how it ever turned out). But they had issues from toddlerhood through gradeschool and of course, adolescence, which is when we lost touch. I think my friend could not relate to my infertility angst especially as she was in the thick of a bad relationship with her daughter at the same time I was in the thick of longing for children. My friend had other children and had a nice relationship with them, no problems.

I witnessed in my own family some of this and it was never resolved. It makes sense that parents, being people, and children, being people, would not always be a match made in heaven. But then I think, shouldn't parental love be able to trump personality clashes? Is there anything written on this? How can you be the best parent you can be to try to prevent a personality clash from being destructive to all concerned?