And from that outpouring of love and support it sounds like you are highly valued and appreciated at your job. I hope you can heal from your loss. I know you'll miss her.
If it's possible, please try to not read too much into what your DH should have done. Emotions are so raw now, probably for both of you but especially for you, that I doubt if any good can come from thinking too much about it or from a confrontation right now. But I do understand that it hurt you and I hope that by venting here, a bit of the hurt went away.
Hugs to you, Renate. And again, I am so sorry for your loss.