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what were your feelings when trying for number two?

May 7 2012 at 8:24 PM
birdy1600  (Login birdy1600)

I am noticing such a host of different feelings from trying for one than two.
For example, with one? I did every thing and THEN some: pineapple (still gonna do that yum!)
bedrest (they changed to one day and I'm okay with THAT)
visualization photos of little kids (surprisingly girls and I had a boy! ha ha!)
A lamb doll (based on my brilliant yet wacky and unproven Parrot theory which is: Parrots see ping pong balls and lay eggs.
So, I figure if I held a lamb doll, did motions of being a mommy my body would conceive)
Tapes of visualization

You name it, I DID it. now, of course, for me, I was blessed to have it work the first time out. I had not even done OE ivf before just this. And wow! how amazing, and how lucky.

Now we are going for number two. I am terrified by my feelings which are a bit messed up cause my anti depressants are way low for me. Here is what I am feeling:
a. at first I wanted to do it allll the same still kept the picture but it's in moving boxes
b. terrified to know this time, the stats are, the journey may be more realistic as in, I may need to try a few times.
c. terrified because I don't think about this cycle every minute of every day as I did the first cause I have a baby to take care of.
d. depressed cause I did NOT get the baby weight off, my body doesn't seem to want to, and between moving, being poor in the City, and getting used to an area I have NOT had time.

The only thing I have realized yet is that I don't need visualization pics I have a live baby to look at!
AND I don't need a lamb doll (but I still want it) because I can hold a squirmy toddler instead.

Did any of YOU experience different feelings and shifts as you went for your second or third child? what changed? how did you handle it? any advice? thank you all!

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(Login demomone)

Birdy unrelated comment here

May 7 2012, 8:45 PM 

Not sure you have read the recent warnings with the antidepressants..but there is clear evidence that some of the SSRI's may be problematic for pregnancy. I was on Celexa before, during and after my DD's birth...she was born with a heart defect (ASD), which has been repaired. There is now evidence that Celexa and several other SSRI's can cause heart defects in utero. I was on half of the starting dose during my pg (10mgs) and still had this issue.
Please check with your docs.

Good luck with your cycle.

This message has been edited by demomone on May 7, 2012 8:46 PM

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(Login birdy1600)

no this is TOTALLY helpful!

May 7 2012, 9:07 PM 

thank you! we are trying to get my dose to what is was for baby birdy. still it makes me wonder!!!! remember baby birds issues breathing? I am just saying!!! he, too, had problems with his throat and I wonder. I am ready to soldier it through for the sake of another baby. But it IS taking a major toll on us. my friend interviewed a couple when she was going to be a gestational carrier who need a Gestational Carrier because she did not want to go off antidepressents, my friend didn't get it. I DO.

thank you so much honey!

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(Login 3becomes4)

gosh, birdy, that is scary!

May 7 2012, 9:23 PM 

I surely hope that his breathing issues weren't caused by the drugs you had to take. What a hard decision. Good luck to you.

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(Login birdy1600)

yes tomorrow we see the doc and he is almost two

May 7 2012, 9:48 PM 

something is going on. I just KNOW. And I remember all the things that happened when he was two and a half months old.

we are going back tomorrow as he is slow to use sippy cups, talk, etc. though he is hitting all other milestones but this is a kid who had surgery at two and a half months old. Then terrible reflux. Thickened formula etc. So I am going back and checking.

as for the antidepressents. this is no joke. it's almost unbearable. but I am trying. not sure how many times I can do this. not kidding on that.

trying to soldier through knowing it is timely issue and can be resolved after a while.

why am I so much worse this time? I think its just post natal, I'm older and nearing menopause, and my mother is so much worse the whole stuff with the house sale, the neighbor attacking me, and so forth happened AFTER the birth of our son. So it is somewhat a perfect storm mix of situational and chemical. I am tough though. I have been through a LOT. so I am going to keep going.

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(Login demomone)

New England Journal of Medicine

May 8 2012, 3:52 AM 

When you go to your doc you can mention that this was published in this very prominent journal several months ago (sorry, but I am unable to post the link). You can go to pubmed.com and google SSRI's and heart defects and it will come up. There are several lawsuits going on right now. The drug was always a class C. If you need to be on a drug for depression there are other options for pregnancy but that would involve a taper of your current drug and trying a new one, which we know would take a few months. Knowing how depression is not good for baby and Mommy during pregnancy, I would give pause to all of this.

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