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Just for laughs: parody birth plan

June 28 2012 at 7:48 PM
  (Login jentenn)

This cracked me up. I never got around to writing out a birth plan as such (and my OB's nurse said that the people with the 12-page birth plans usually ended up with emergency C-section).

http://www.mcsweeneys.net/articles/jamie-and-jeffs-birth-plan

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(Login Blessed_Thistle)

I was trying not to make mine too complicated but

June 29 2012, 6:42 AM 

yup, emergency c section for me! As I recall, I especially did not want ANYONE saying "pushpushpushpushpushpushpush!! pushpushpushpushpushpushpush!!" And I wanted to be offered no more than very light narcotic relief and to have to ask for anything more. No pitocin or other labor speeding measures. Ah well, the perfect pregnancy and birth ain't gonna happen for me now because I am 100% done.


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Maggie in VA
(Login maggie1961)

My doula pushed me to complete one . . .

June 29 2012, 7:39 AM 

And I privately felt it was sort of silly, b/c I thought the chances of a vaginal delivery were so low; but we did end up going to induction; I just wouldn't dilate so they had to do a c-section anyway. My only birth plan absent my doula's extensive forms was, "Get the babies out alive and healthy however you have to do it." Maggie (in VA)

 
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karma
(Login karma2)

Seriously-

June 29 2012, 7:43 AM 

I am all for writing up a birth plan, but in the end....it seems to boil down to 'get them out safe and healthy'.
Funny article!

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Ginger
(Login Ginger09)

That is hysterical!

June 29 2012, 10:33 AM 

Thanks for sharing.

 
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(Login Maya3)

That was pretty funny!

June 29 2012, 5:17 PM 

As for me, every single thing I had "planned" got thrown out the window almost as soon as I got induced.(Thank goodness, I at least got my epidural...FINALLY.) Emergency c-section here, too (and the whole experience was truly awful).

Maya

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