If you are reading this, please email me I need some support. Thanks
I just got a personal email from 2 friendS just few weaks ago and somehow I entered in a catharsis and crisis. They got pregnant so FAST. One natural and the other one with IVF and even with frozen sperm. I can't stop crying since then. I feel desperate and not well grounded. I think this last news face me with my reality I don't want to see as its bringing me down.I find myself asking why me, why my body doesn't work, why my 2 embryos couldn't survive last time. I feel sad and angry MEGA ANGRY, without hopes, without energy, denying myself I have a problem as it's so hard just to accept it. It's enough for me, all the time trying to be strong and avoiding being weak. I feel it and I just want to give up everything. I'm taking my basal temps, supplements, infusions, massage, healthy food everything what I can do and is written in any book to help me to enhance any possible chance to get a miracle baby and NOW THIS .....TODAY I got the results of my FSH TEST =22
I'm just so tired of fighting this battle. I can't win against the endometriosis. Too many years fighting with this damn malady, it's now really enough for me. We even can't think about adoptions as we don't cover the requirements at the moment, by the way Im living in Europe. It's just so hard to overcome this pain.
# 2002 A smart Doctor discovered my Endometriosis level IV, so I got 2 operations and treatment against it, the treatments did calm down the pain (back then I didn't want to have kids) but didn't cure the Endo, after each treatment the pain was increasing and put me out again of activities again
# November 2006 bad health problems due the myomas, bleeding a lot each month, nutrional problems and lack of iron, I went into treatment
# April 2007 I got married with the love of my life and we tried a lot...to have a baby, I swear it (. ,but nothing happened.
# March 2008 I went into surgery again because of the Endo, after operation we were told my tubes were completely blocked ):
# After operation I went to a treatment to stop the entometriosis again , this treatment put me in a menopause mood for almost 1 year
# October 2008 started our first ICSI cycle they also discovered that my DH has a problem with the little swimmers so they didn't give us another option. After 1 month of starting short protocol. The ultrasound showed the previous corpus luteus activated on the left ovary so they stopped the treatment.
# Again because of my endo they continued giving me medicament to control it so no period no hormones in the right place, no chance to start another cycles again
# January 2009 another cycle of ICSI now long protocol...but it didn't work either 1 embryo BFN
# 2009 after this I stopped taking medication and started following some natural remedies, I feel much better.
2010 FSH TEST 22