Was doing pretty good but went to RE today for consult to check where we are on things and I'm down and I don't know why. I'm an idiot I guess. I honestly didn't think it would be this difficult the second time around. Stats, 33 yrs, fsh 10.6 (borderline). Trying for #2 for one year now. Anyway, RE said I need to do a laparoscopy to check for endo, then one round of injectibles with IUI to figure out protocol and if we would have enough eggs to make it to retrival for an IVF. All sounds very reasonable so why in the heck am I so down? Why do all the women in my life get pregnant just by looking at their spouses and what is so incredibly wrong with me that I can't get pg? Not to mention the fact that we can't afford any of this. I just wish I could be happy again. I want to feel like I did after ds was born with absolutely no worries or concerns about IF or getting pg again.

I think you and I are in pretty similiar situations. I feel a little foolish that I still have hope that I'll get pg naturally.
I can understand why you feel down. I hate going to see an RE, it is so unpleasant. And frustrating.
I'm pretty down myself today, so I guess we're a pair. sigh.

AF is due anytime now, but I don't remember the exact date, so I'm starting to wonder (which will very soon turn into obsessing) whether I could be pg... sigh... I am determined to have another baby no matter what it takes (and I'm making progress on the new DE cycle plan) so it's not really the not-having-a-baby aspect that bothers me so much (although I realize that there are no guarantees that anything will work) it's just that it'd be SO GREAT if it happened naturally. Month after month I get this depressing reminder that my body is completely useless, so demoralizing, the main aspect that makes us different from men and it doesn't work for me! I was just feeling some DE consent forms and there was this question on the "reason for using donated eggs" -- WTF??!!! They want me to admit in writing that I'm a failure??!! And hell if I know what's the reason for this crap anyway