Last night [Team A] and [Team B] skated to a 2-2 tie. (70% of all Hockey games end in a 2-2 tie so this is a safe intro.)
The outcome could have been much worse for our hometown team were it not for the stellar net-minding of [Team A]'s star goaltender [Goalie Name Here], who continued his excellent play this season maintaining a save percentage over 90%. (All NHL goalies save percentages are above 90%)
Said team captain, Mark Messier (Mark Messier is the team captain on most NHL teams anyway, and if he's not, he will be eventually.) "We almost let one get away here tonight, if it weren't for our goalie. I mean, the guy was standing on his head all night." (Apparently, in order to maintain a 90% save percentage, goaltenders are required to stand on their heads every other game)
The slow pace of tonight's game can be attributed to the fact that both teams were executing the dreaded "neutral zone trap" forcing the other team to "dump and chase" rather than "carrying the line."
"You know, when you go up against the neutral zone trap you really have to take care of the puck, guys really have to skate, I mean, you've got to go to the net." added Messier.
[Team A] did catch a bit of a break tonight as [Team B] was without their top scorer [Top Scorer's Name Here] who missed his 7th straight game as a result of an Ulf Samuelson cheap-shot last month. (60% of all top scorers are sidelined by Ulf Samuelson cheap-shots, the other 40% are sidelined by Claude Lemieux cheap-shots so the two are virtually interchangeable)
Last night's contest was not without controversy, however, as [Team A] was the victim of some questionable officiating. In the third period alone, [Team A] had 4 goals called back as a result of a "player in the crease" violation while [Team B] had only a mere two goals called back. Referee Andy VanHellemond (The only referee in the NHL, by the way) was criticized for "putting the whistle in his pocket" for the last 10 minutes of regulation. (There have only been 11 penalties called in the last ten minutes of an NHL Hockey game since 1952. I'm serious, look it up!)
Last night's game was best summed up by [Team A] coach _______ Sutter (98% of all NHL teams are coached by one of the Sutter brothers, the other two teams are coached by guys named Jacques) who stated "You know, tonight's game was one of those ugly games that was won in the trenches, our guys did a great job in the corners tonight with the possible exception of our Russian guys who play more of a finesse game, but the key to tonight's tie was our ability to put the puck on net, our guys skated for the full 60 minutes, we put our checking line up against their first line and they did a hell of a job both fore-checking, back-checking, hip-checking, body-checking double-checking, and coat-checking, we got good production out of our power play, our penalty killing was solid, and I think we matched up pretty well with them at even strength, all in all, we're happy to come out of here with the one point."