Unfortunate about your previous peds.
My story was not to say whether my friend supports vaccines or not. My point is that her sons story has enough merit as yours. Yes, a person could get pertussis. It could happen to my kid. But what happened to her son could too. It was stated earlier that parents don't have the right to decide this on their own. I categorically oppose that sort of attitude. All I'm saying is: don't let stories and anecdotes decide. Research it. Listen to your instincts.
And as for kids without vaccinations playing with those who are, I can see the point. I can also see some folks pOint when they say "If your kids are vaccinated it should be fine." of course babies are not- thus the problem and the main reason DH and I got vaccines for pertussis when he was born. I also think its murky water to ask that non-vaccing parents tell you or others. That's tricky with Privacy laws.
In the end I believe that this is the choice of the parents. Informed and educated parents- not ones who just do the opposite of what the "government" says bc they are obstinant and not doing it because it's just what everyone does.