First, I am sorry you're suffering from this- it's an awful way to live. Awful.
I've become more anxious than usual with this pregnancy and have heard from a few doctors that pregnancy and hormones can absolutely make it much, much worse.(I have always had anxiety as well) but this pregnancy has taken it to a whole new level. I tend to worry about the baby, yes..and every ache and pain and that I will miscarry (my newest one is that she will be still born) I have also taken to worrying incessantly about my husband. Everytime he leaves to go to work (one job he works is in one of the 5 boroughs so it's alot of city driving which in NY is INSANE) and I fear he will get into a car accident and die. Then things spiral out of control..what will I do? I have no family, who will help me? How will I do this alone? I will have to go back to work full time, what will happen to my baby, how will we afford to survive in NY, etc etc etc...I literally feel ILL and panicked until he reaches his destination and lets me know he's there. Not normal and not good...
People who don't suffer from anxiety don't get it and will tell you to do a meditation tape or "breathe" or "you have to calm down" (as if we aren't aware that this is not healthy, as if we don't WANT to be calm- which is why I don't like discussing what I go through w/anyone but my therapist or a really close friend who knows me) - while they may slightly help- this is beyond doing breathing/meditation, and is NOT going to be the CURE without some extra help- anxiety is a medical condition, so I'm GLAD you're seeking therapy.
I am also in therapy but in the process of finding a new one, as the current one and I are NOT on the same page and I feel frustrated and never better after several months of sessions with him. What does help me is when I panic, I try to address each panic (ie- if something were to happen to DH, you have resources in place to be okay for awhile, you had a successful career and will be able to find work again, you won't be on the streets, etc) Talking through the panic helps alot.
I also know some people who have had to go on meds in pregnancy because their axniety got so bad. I won't lie, I am trying to avoid doing that myself, but if it got to a point where I could no longer function, i would consider that. Anxiety of that degree is not good for you or your growing baby.
I hope you will feel better with every session you have. My heart goes out to you- believe me, I get it.
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