What practical jokes did you pull, or were you a victim of?
When I was on the USS Frederick (derisevely called the Fast Freddie) I got stuck on a laundry detail. I was a PFC at the time, and such is the fate of the low man on the totem pole. In a moment of boredom, or perhaps a rare moment of brilliance, I thought it would be funny to starch the CO's skivvies. They were like cardboard. Unfortunately he didn't find it as funny as I did, and while I don't remember his exact words I think involved a threat of serious bodily harm should it happen again.
Another time in Hokkaido, Japan my unit was staying on some Japanese Army base after returning from the field. One night at the baths (the Japanese soldiers fill large bowls with hot water and wash themselves, its not a shower), I noticed a friend of mine coming in as I was about to leave. While he was washing up, I stole his clothes and towel and just left him his boots and glasses. It was not long after evening chow either, so there were plenty of people out. It was a about a 2 mile hike back to our barracks from the baths, and he was forced to streak it. Part of the way was past a barracks for Japanese females as well. LOL
I wonder what the Japs were thinking when they saw a naked gaijin (foreigner) go hauling by. They had to think he was out of his mind.
The American Marine Division has the highest combat effectiveness in the American armed forces. It seems not enough for our four divisions to surround and annihilate its two regiments.
---Mao Tse Sung to General Song, prior to Chosin Reservoir
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we used to have a fovourite and i'm sure batco must have done this at some point.
you always picked on the guy that was the 'model soldier'. he would be first up, last down, smartest dressed etc etc.
all the beds in barracks are the cheapest nastiest medal framed things you have seen.
we would use bungies from our excercise ponchoes and strap them around him and his bed whilst he slept. then about the time he was due to get up we would flip the bed up onto its headboard and so the guy was stuck there hanging upside down until we saw fit to let him down
always amused me
On the 8th day God created Ben-Britain and he took over!
"when I get home people'll ask me,'hey Hoot, why do ya do it man? Why? Just some war junkie?' Ya know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand it's about the man next to you, and that's it. That's all it is."
SGT 1st Class Norman Hooten
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1. Schildkrötenrennen. Its a race between 2 soldiers over 2 floors. Each soldier would have 2 helmets under his elbows and 2 under his knees. They would then have to take the stairs at crawling run. The first one down is the winner
2. Sometimes we would take some guy that slept really good and transport to diffenrt places in the barracks and let him carry on sleeping there.
3. Every night before "bedtime" we had to build a Alarm chair, on this chair we placed our uniform, ect so that we could dress quickly in case of an attack or war. So what some would do if the others were already slepping is take the other dudes underware and strech it over 2 chairs, the next morning they would have the size of skirts
4. We always had a couple of guys that were never ready dressed in time when we were called with an alarm, thus we always had to do extra push-up, ect.
So one night while they were slepping we just stapled them with their blankets to the bed
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The best jokes are always at someone else's expense.
The American Marine Division has the highest combat effectiveness in the American armed forces. It seems not enough for our four divisions to surround and annihilate its two regiments.
---Mao Tse Sung to General Song, prior to Chosin Reservoir
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i like the one with the stretching of the underwear. i will have to remember that one
On the 8th day God created Ben-Britain and he took over!
"when I get home people'll ask me,'hey Hoot, why do ya do it man? Why? Just some war junkie?' Ya know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand it's about the man next to you, and that's it. That's all it is."
SGT 1st Class Norman Hooten
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Yes, I remember that during basic. I remember though, when I was at the atr, one of the other training platoons had a soldier that did the same thing but went that tad too far. He done it so the unfortunate looked like he was crucified, gagged him, then hung him out of the window. The fella that did it was charged on more than one count due to the fact that the victim was an ethnic friend.
I knew the soldier that did it quite well, he was one of the only other Londoners on camp & a fierce Millwall fan, the last I heard was that he was kept in but charged for something else, he took a dislike to one of the other prisoners & beat the sh*te out of him whilst he was sleeping. Not good!!!
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On the 8th day God created Ben-Britain and he took over!
"when I get home people'll ask me,'hey Hoot, why do ya do it man? Why? Just some war junkie?' Ya know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand it's about the man next to you, and that's it. That's all it is."
SGT 1st Class Norman Hooten
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Does choking the chicken count as curing boredom? Because one time during basic, we were in the field and in trenches. So one guy who was in the prone position tells his buddy to relieve him. 5 minutes later we hear "Sergeant, look at what I did!" and there it was, white fluid in the corner of the trench!
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for practice were were shooting at cows sheeps across the border (PKK villages in N. Iraq). you should see how those poor animals blow up when hit by a 120 mm mortar.
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What we did got us in a little bit of trouble.
We told two new recruits to take a dead person already in a body bag, and load him into a truck, we made up some stupid story how this guy died.
As these two guy's grabbed the body bag, the guy in the body bag started to go nuts with moaning and screaming, LOL I still laugh my asss off when I think about it.
I almost thought we had to do CPR on these two recruits, they were scared ****less.
They didn't think it was funny at all, I had tears coming down my face from laughing, then these two pussy's reported us.
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On the 8th day God created Ben-Britain and he took over!
"when I get home people'll ask me,'hey Hoot, why do ya do it man? Why? Just some war junkie?' Ya know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand it's about the man next to you, and that's it. That's all it is."
SGT 1st Class Norman Hooten
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i keept being caught absent without leave during the night as i was courting some hookers in downtown Nimes.
So i get punished repeatedly and the ultimate was being ban from the promotion "jump" (one static from Noratlas or the then new Transall if i'm correct...
So i went to the Nime's Airfield because i could see guys doing freefall there while still under sanction NOT to leave the base. And an Adjudent showed me some compassion and took me on the SMPS rooster (Section Militaire de Parachutisme Sportif).
The foils where TAP 6520 basic 24 fuseaux with 4 panels open for a little directional authority and a was jumpimg from Nord-aviation Broussard (later from Cessna Centurion at Chalon-sur Saone a civilian airfield wit a beauty of a female inst!!!!).
At the BA 726 my instructor was geting bannana with me as i keeped separating the static from the Main after he'd inspected my rig.... Basically landing a good 4/5Mn before anyone else because i would go face down and the main' would strugle to pull out until i reached the desired speed, which sometime meaned "puting a shoulder in the wind" because i was too flat and the extractor was traped on the void behind me and could not pull on its own on the turbulences.
Can remember nearly killing myself once; The first guy to jump was a "first timer" and keep looking to the ground (he was seating at the doorstep with his legs out) He was a good friend but we had to circle twice and the pilot turned toward us to say "last pass, if he doesnt go we land and take the next stick". I told Pitchou "if you dont go i'll have you going"... He replied dont be sealy. Nearly at the time of turning back, I could see the instructor's hands BEHIND Pitchou's chute ready to give him a little help
But the idiot was STILL geting himself scarted to death looking under his feets, I pushed him with BOTH my feets and as soon as i could see his static pulling i went myself. The problem was i didnt realise that my canopy wasnt geting any air because of his ans i literaly landed on the edge of his chute when it (Luckyly) fully opened. My instructor told me "you're mad Sampaix". And then whent on explaining that i could have killed us both having landed on a more central point of Pitchou's foil. He wrote "Doit se calmer a la sortie" on my log book. I let you guy to translate the caption. I ended up with 11 jumps (5 from broussard 6 from centurion which had its door on the opposite side>>>> Pitchou did find the experience "interesting"... FUN FUN rock'n'roll Art school!
2 Gyrene) I had a good laugh at your story and somehow i do envy your situation as it looks like you have been around a little!! What is the type of ship you're sailing on?
This message has been edited by sampaix on Feb 24, 2004 3:59 PM This message has been edited by sampaix on Feb 23, 2004 3:23 PM This message has been edited by sampaix on Feb 23, 2004 3:17 PM
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i keept being caught absent without leave during the night as i was courting some hookers in downtown Nimes.
LMAO
Well at least you had your priorities in order.
2 Gyrene) I had a good laugh at your story and somehow i do envy your situation as it looks like you have been around a little!! What is the type of ship you're sailing on?
The USS Frederick, a.k.a. the Fast Freddie is a an old LST. It's the biggest piece of crap to sail the seven seas.
She's slow as hell, and flat bottomed, which means she rocks with even the slightest wave. In storms she sounds like she's about to come apart and you have to tie yourself in when you sleep. In fact during a storm we had some kind of fuel leak in our berthing area. The sailors cleaned it up and repaired whatever broke, but it stunk to high heaven for a couple days. After the storm subsided I would sneak topside and sleep in one of the vehicles that were on deck.
I was also on the USS Belleau Wood which is an LHA.
The American Marine Division has the highest combat effectiveness in the American armed forces. It seems not enough for our four divisions to surround and annihilate its two regiments.
---Mao Tse Sung to General Song, prior to Chosin Reservoir
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All right not too high tech but still going some places. Sometime, when i go to sleep i make myself a "movie" ang go sailling a Ticonderoga class to protect Taiwan against an imminent Chineese invasion!!!! I have played Jane's fleet command a lot and it is actualy the only reason why i keep double booting my PCs with Window98 and a professional one!
Sub command is also fun although a lot slower!
If you're still sailing, say hello from me to your friends on board!
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On the 8th day God created Ben-Britain and he took over!
"when I get home people'll ask me,'hey Hoot, why do ya do it man? Why? Just some war junkie?' Ya know what I'll say? I won't say a goddamn word. Why? They won't understand. They won't understand why we do it. They won't understand it's about the man next to you, and that's it. That's all it is."
SGT 1st Class Norman Hooten
Scoring disabled. You must be logged in to score posts.
