First I want to mention that River was only three years older than me, so you can imagine the "out of reality" fantasies my young mind came up with my during my adolescence. River was my sole ideal. River profoundly shaped my views on society. He challenged the norms with articulate passive strength. He always led by emotion, led by what action is more compassionate. In 1988 his non compliance with Hollywood was shocking. Even worse back then he was constantly addressing sexual identity questions because of his role in MOPI. He really was ahead of the game. But aren't people like him, the free thinkers who encourage us to face fears and never stop building our own strengths?

Eighty something he was on Phil Donnahue (talk show before Oprah), I remember how he was figgety and not focused. He looked sick. That was the first time I physically felt, empathized, his pain. He spoke about vegetarianism and his words were short and blunt. He was frustrated that "not killing animals is the way to live" wasn't as clear for others as it was for himself. That boy seriously took on a role of savior. Savior for anyone who needed. That's a lot for anyone. Of course drugs. Dah!!! And lots of them to turn the hurt off.

Little bro J.P. has developed into one of the most talented actors we have seen. Maybe River was here to help J.P. take off. Or to affect a handful who are now thirty somethings. Who are now in power roles. We may see some River philosophies soon or at least more.

Dream: He was poking his head out of a waterfall. Back in and out, like "boo". He was playful and at peace. The water was a healing electric blue and aqua. He was neon yellow. The water smelled like peaches.

By the way I haven't thought about him in ages and I have a dream near his death anniversary kinda creeped my out.

Thanks
D

Hi Deni

It was real interesting to read your post.I especially liked the part where you said that maybe river was here to help his brother and other 30 somethings like ....ahem.....me!
I too am only a few years younger than him 4 in fact and yes like you had an enormous crush on river as well.
Your dream sounds fascinating although I've never had one of him myself only dreamy thoughts...lol!!.
Its so nice to be able to log on here and read about other people's influences that river had on them during his life and even his death.There is a great bunch of people on here rikki,mof,fatymma,ekoostik,val etc etc...sorry if I missed a few anyway hope to chat to you again soon Deni....take care.

River has touched so many lives in so many ways in the past and will continue to do so well into the future..What he had..his talent,his kindness,his compassion,etc. is i believe something we all draw strength from. It is a kind of hope for the future,a way of thinking,it is what brings us all together..right here on this forum..each of us thousands of miles apart but so close. River will always be remembered as long as people like us continue to keep the flame burning and never let it fade.