For as long as I could remember, I would walk into a room with a feeling of dread. With any room with more than four people in it, I seemed to start having problems figuring out which were my emotions and which ones just seemed to wash over me from out of no where like a wave in the sea.

Family get togethers were always the worst, I felt like I had no control over myself. I had no idea what was going on in the family, so alot of the arguements, and things that most adults would talk about behind the children, I was completely unaware of. But on more than one occassion I'd find myself climbing up on to someone's lap and just hugging them, usually with a phrase like '/I/ still love you.'.

It never ceased to get that person in tears and hugging me back saying thank you. But I had no clue what I was doing. It wasn't till I was 11 years old that my mother introduced me (privately) to my teacher. A wonderful woman who had been trained for her entire life by her grandmother. My own family being very religious based, this was something I kept quiet for a long time.

My dreams, one in particular had plagued me from the day I could start to remember dreams (and still does to this day), on the same time every month for three days. Impressions from people I didn't know. And a bit of an affinity for wind and fire that I couldn't explain to anyone. I didn't like /setting/ fires, but I liked playing with candle flames. My teacher said I could make them dance, I never quite understood what she meant by that.

To this day I wonder, was my teacher telling me the truth? Was my mother? So many times I would just... know... I needed to call my mother or my brother. My brother and I having been tied together by a bond even my mother can't explain. But so many times I knew when he needed me, and he knew when I needed him. We didn't even grow up together, but people call us twin souls. All we can do is smile at the terminology used.

Still, to this day I can't be in crowds, there's so many emotions and I've lost myself before, notknowing what my emotions were, ending up angry for no reason, crying, or in a panic attack I couldn't explain. I've been on medications for anxiety in thought it was all in my mind, it wasn't till my teacher finally got ahold of me again and taught me how to meditate I stopped having those episodes.

Is this all in my mind? Am I just needing therapy and to thank my mother for putting the ideas in my head? Is there a reason why I just seem to know how people are feeling and what it is they need at that time even though I didn't know what was going on? With my old teacher gone, is there some where I can turn to, where I can find another teacher who is meant for me? To teach me what I need to learn? Like how to tune people out so I can actually feel comfortable in society again? Can anyone help?

No you are not crazy you are a empath and most likely very psychic as well.
There are ways to protect yourself from the influnence of other peoples energy it is called sheilding .You can use meditation to do that . I think Reiki would be excellent choice for you as well that way you can learn how to clear your own energy from impurties. Remember everything is energy .There is so much I can say about these subjects there is just know to communicate it all here.Next year I will begin an internet radio show devoted to spiritual development on all levels it is already in the works at this time I will post showtimes here on the forums and there will be free time where callers may call in and ask questions .Hope this helps !
Love and Light Eternally ,
Deborah Anna