I like to share some of these questions in the hopes it can help others.
1. Why has no one ever heard of plug-mold and should I believe my electrician (I'm in NJ) when he tells me it is no longer up to code (even though he didn't know what it is called) and that is why no one will install it? I hate the outlets that are about to go in my backsplash, but there seems no way out.
No problem at all. As for the plugmold, I personally recommend against it for a few reasons. One is it is a difficult install properly to meet code requirements. The other is when you plug items in you have to always lean over and look for the receptacle and if you leave wires plugged in they hang right across the backsplash. I am not sure what type of backsplash you are going to have but with tile there are options in devices that allow almost an exact match for color.
2. I wanted strips of Xenon lights, its a nice kitchen, I thought that would be a high end touch. My electrician says he prefers halogens toward the back of each cabinet since you don't seee the wire as much. I'm afraid that halogens are hotter, and that you will see them at the back of the cab far more than in the front, and I don't want to light the wall, but the counter. But what happens to the wires for the xenon strips in the front? Similiarly, he says remote transformers are "old school" the electrical supply place says that is the only way to go with xenon lights.
For the xenon UC lights you may want to look at Kitchler fixtures. They make a unit that goes against the back wall and are xenon. Another option is to mount the strip lights against the back wall which will still give you a nice effect.
3. Finally (I promise) I went with installing the high hats so they are in the gap between the upper cab and the edge of the counter top. That sounds like what you recomend, so I'm just checking. Can I believe the electrician when he says that I can use halogen or incandescent bulbs so long as I don't exceed the wattage of the high hat (150)?
High hats sound in the right place and yes you can use both halogens and incandescents. As for the wattage it should say inside the can or on the trim.