This post and the replies have been moved from the "OPEN" board to "Discovery" where it is more appropriate.

Just needed to vent for a minute about the OW in our lives. What a stupid, controlling, pain in the ***!!!! H last spoke to her in the beginning of January to tell her he would be having no more contact with her and would not be a part of her son's life other than for court ordered child support. She has supposedly been going to go through the court system since December to have child support go through them, but to date we have received no notice from the state and H continues to send OW a check each week. Wonder if she's dragging her feet just to keep this meaningless bit of contact with him? Since then she has shown up to two basketball games that she knew he would be at, the most recent being two days ago. I usually go to these games, but as "luck" would have it I wasn't at either because of scheduling conflicts. Keep in mind that she has no innocent reason for being there and I truly believe she is only doing it to try and get H back into her life. H won big points for telling me both times about her being there and for not acknowledging her in any way. When he tells me I just thank him for being honest with me, ask how it made him feel, and tell him I love him and how proud I am for him being honest with me. Inside I'm seething that the whore can't take a hint and leave us alone. So thanks for listening to my tirade!


Author Reply
Jess
(Login JessaAnn) Re: Venting about OW February 9 2006, 12:13 PM

Stay close to your friends-stay closer to your enemies. Know thy enemy. Would you expect anything less from this type of person? She is clearly doing this on purpose simply because she is dense, desperate and pathetic. It does help to vent though. I began a journal recently. Boy, I didn't know I even knew several of the words ((explatives)) that I used. I even think I invented some new ones! But it is for me and me only, so I can call that nasty B..ch anything I want! Anyhow, as much as a struggle as it is on a day to day basis, try, try to not let her have any control over you by letting her get to you. Remember, I said it is a BIG struggle, because I want to firmly place all my anger and bitterness and hurt squarely on her quite robust acreage of an ass. See, now you have me starting.....

Back to you:

As your OW continues this rancid behavior, it will become clearer and clearer to your H who has the class. It is good that you reinforce and acknowledge the "good behavior" from your H. I believe that anything can be broken down to basic feelings of childhood. Reenforce the good, give the attention to the positive, and more will naturally follow.

Vent any time.....Sometimes I think it is like that phantom hand syndrome, where your hands work independently of your body. Your thoughts just take over your hands and you are amazed and what you write!!!! Or perhaps I have just been reading too many Stephen King books or my meds need to be dialed up alittle bit!! LOL Take care

Jess

Don't let her take any more of your valuable time than she already has. It is great that your H has told you.

I did have a question about your situation. Did she show up at a basketball game of the OC? If so, why hasn't she always attended her child's events or was it your child's?

Just wondering... I am not saying to trust her even if it is the OC's event, because obviously the OW is not trustworthy.

That's the funniest thing - there was no reason for her to show up. My husband is a junior high/high school basketball coach and he was there with the team for a game. The OW used to work at the same school a couple of years ago. To my knowledge she has no real connection to anyone currently on the team. I think H really is starting to see the light as to what a manipulative pain in the ass she really is, and is even finally considering the idea that she got pregnant on purpose (duh!!).