A little while ago I wrote to you guys that I thought my husband was having an emotional affair with my best friend...well tonight I know that it is not only emotional. He is having a full blown affair with her for at least 3 month now. The worst part is that they were sleeping with each other in my bed while I was sleeping in the other room. And all the while they were telling me I was crazy and that they were just friends. He actually used me to make her jealous when she would not sleep with him. After I confronted him he told me that he still loved me and didn’t want to leave me and then I went to her house and she told me everything had stopped a few weeks ago but a saw a text from her to him that said to move in with her. While I was at her house he drove up with a suit case and he now moved in with her...I can’t believe how two people that I love so much could be so heartless and cold. The worst thing is I want him back; I don’t want to loose him. How can that be after what he has done to me?
I can’t believe how much I am hurting right now. I almost died giving birth to my son three month ago oh how I wish I would have.
How can you throw away 6 years for three month? He didn’t even say that he was sorry.....nothing. You should have seen the smug look on his face when he walked into her house with his suit case....it was like a slap in my face.
You know I would even understand if we had had problems but there was nothing. We were happier than ever....and the whole time he is telling me how much he loves me and how lucky he is to have me as a wife. What do I do now, where do I go from here? Her and my kids are friends, they go to the same school and she only lives a few streets away from me, I can’t even avoid them. The thought of them together is killing me. They are in bed sleeping peacefully and I am sitting here destroyed. I don’t want them to be happy I want them to hurt like me; I want them to feel guilty and horrible. How could I have been so blind?
I can understand what you are feeling, my wife's second affair was with my (ex) best male friend and fishing buddy. Someone I had known longer than I have known her.
You are dealing with a double betrayal, your best friend, your husband, and your best(I assume ex-best) female friend. It is a double whammy, a huge blow to your belief system, and understanding what has happened I know you face a lot more pain before you get back on your feet.
Yes, I felt like dying too, but the feeling like dying is just that, feelings. You have a helpless three month old baby that depends on you for everything in his day. His source of warmth, food, comfort, health, and so much more. You damned sure don't want him having to depend on his father for that since his father was able to walk away from both of you.
As for how could you have been so blind, that is an easy one for me to answer. I was blind because I blindly trusted both my wife and my ex best male friend. I could not concieve of them doing anything to hurt me. Your character, ethical belief system, and moral values would are different than both of theirs. Your good qualities and traits only re-enforced your belief that they couldn't do this.
Time is short right now as I am getting ready to leave for work, but don't stop posting. Come to us and share whatever you need too. Come to us and vent, come to us for understanding. Anyone that is a couple of years out from D-Day can understand and appreciate all that you are going through.
Most importantly, love your son and know that you will teach him good values and character traits. Don't let someone else's stupid choices change the good person you are. I will try to write more later today, for right now, rest when your son does and take care of you because your son is depending on you for everything.
Your story reminds me exactly of mine. I am in your shoes. I found out about a month ago and they are still together too. It makes me sick. I have passed them driving in the car together because we live in the same town too. I have decided that they are very selfish and cruel people. I think it's such a joke that they "love" each other. Give me a break. It's something different, exciting and new. It's the same game just different players. They will soon realize that it's not all fun and games once real life kicks in. The honeymoon will be over and the reality will strike. You will be on to your new and BETTER life!!! And they will be envious of you!!!! Good luck. Stay strong. And remember - KARMA. What goes around comes around!!!!