Well I finally contacted my lawyer and have divorce papers drawn up..............geesh I know it's about time. I guess I just had to wait until I was ready. My lawyer cut straight to the chase and sent a letter to my ex's parents telling them to call and give her an address for the wayward son or have him call her office asap. Keep your fingers crossed for me that he is found quick.......at $200 an hour I can't afford for this to be long and drawn out.

Other changes.......

My sister has bought a house in Edmonton (Fort Saskatchewan actually) and will be moving away with my nieces before Christmas. Her H is currently working out there and the job market is apparently booming. The house she bought is estimated to increase in value by something like 40% this year!! Talk about an investment.

I am not quite sure where that leaves me. Loosing my nieces is going to be so hard. I feel like I have lost so much in my life already. One thing is for sure, the Sunday night dinner table at my parents is shrinking!! My budget isn't going to allow very many visits to Edmonton since it is about a 3-4 hour plane ride or 2 days of driving. Plus that leaves me here alone in case my dad gets sick again This Christmas I may end up spending alone and I am not sure exactly how I feel about that. (my sister is planning on having Christmas in her new house with my parents.....I am invited but it isn't in the budget)

Another Change......

I got a promotion at work so I am moving to a new building and working with people I don't know all that well.



Sigh...tonight seems to be a night of rambling or venting.....not sure why but I just am feeling a bit unsettled.

Kid

Kid,

Life goes on with us or without us. Getting stuck every now and then is part of it.


Chris.

What time is dinner at your place?

H2C, will you swing by and scoop me on your way to Kim's?

Onward and upward, Kim!! Change can be goooooooooooooooood! (Except your sister moving, that's going to be hard - and I am sorry for that!)

Monica

My yesterdays are all boxed up - and neatly put away.

Kid

I received a Complaint for divorce in the mail about 6 days ago so it looks like it could be final for both of us around the same time frame. I felt absolutely nothing when I received them. The ex said he is having some difficulty in his dating life because he is only legally separated. There goes my medical and dental coverage and that stinks, but I think I'll feel better being completely divorced too. My lawyer was really cool. When I called and asked him to just take a peek at my Complaint paperwork and inquired about costs, he told me to just buy him lunch, so we are meeting in about 2 hours for lunch. Real nice guy.

I understand how hard that is when family moves away. My sister and her family left about 4 months before ex and I separated and we hung out all the time and my best fried moved out of state a few months later. It stinks!!!!

Charlie

Charlie...

Send your lawyer up here and I'll buy him dinner
Unfortunately I have to initiate everything thereby incurring major legal fees. The seperation agreement was drawn up by my lawyer and my ex didn't even retain a lawyer so basically it added to my bill. Thankfully at the end my lawyer convinced him to pay half of my bill. He is supposed to pay for 1/2 the divorce as well, but I doubt I will ever see the money.

I am not upset, I am just unsettled. It is hard to describe how I feel. It seems to be alot like the lethal plain of flatness to me.

H2C - dinner will be at 6 pm and you and your beautiful wife and both invited.

Ok, we will be there in a couple of months. We want to see snow out the dining room window. We'll swing by and pick up Monica.

Uh, 'scuze me. I think Mr. and Mrs. Joe-Bob better come here first and pick me up. I've always wanted to be a pick-up in a pick-up.


TLMM

Emmersom, can you meet us at Monsica's. Thats as far west as my pick-up can pick-up. Besides aren't you supposed to be in Japan or Belize or Hawaii or something? Ms. whoopty doo world traveler.

Joebob-

I leave Aug. 30th- And when I get back I have rehearsals for a play, "Enchanted April". I read for the part of Costanza- an Italian maid who has had 9 kids. Woo Hoo! I'ma gonna nead soma dark make-up.

All my lines are in Italian. I will send photo of opening night, (in costume).

How are you and the misses gonna come and visit me, if not by truck?

TLMM

You a finally meta your a calling. You gonna maka great a Italiana momma. Guido, he willa be so proud ofa you.

"Thats as far west as my pick-up can pick-up."

You are definitely invited too MM (I couldn't leave my substitute mom out of the loop)

But remember what happens when H2C travels south......perhaps the same thing happens if he travels too far west. Airline travel is safer and MUCH cheaper unless of course he needs another new vehicle


I guess I just always imagined me watching my nieces grow up and helping them in their troubled teenage years. The auntie they could confide in and stay with when things were hard at home. Someplace safe for them to go. Now they will be so far away that everytime I see them they will have grown so much. I will go from seeing them once a week to once or twice a year. That will be a huge change for me! I always thought of them as the kids I never got to have. I will have to show them how to use MSN and buy a webcam so I can see them. Thank God for technology!!!!

I am not upset about the divorce except for the fact that it is costing so much money. I would have done it long ago if finances weren't a factor. Also it was a matter of principal for me.......he screwed up the marriage so I wanted him to pay for the divorce. Lately I have done some thinking and decided that I wanted to get rid of that loose end so it didn't haunt me. I am a bit worried that he will ignore the papers and waste more of my money or he will just refuse to sign them just for spite. I guess that remains to be seen.

Again tonight I feel restless. I haven't been able to sleep lately either. Of course right now I have a huge goose egg on my head from something stupid I did yesterday and my head is still pounding from it. Maybe I will go to the store and buy a novel to read tonight and make a massage appointment for tomorrow. That oughta work!

Kid

H2C, it's LINDSica, silly. Whoopty doo world traveler CRAAAACKED me up!!

Hey Kim, you can be the cool Aunt they come visit on summer break! I know it really blows to lose part of your support system - but, there's always Wisconsin, right?!

Monica

My yesterdays are all boxed up - and neatly put away.

Hmmm just had a vision of That 70's Show flash by. Hello Wisconsin!!!! That could be us haha .... I get to be the guy who owns the photohut!!!

Seriously though....how much cheese can a person eat. Isn't that what Wisconsin is famous for?

Kid

Yes, I think they eat alllllotta cheese in Wisconsin. I think they may have a football team, too... They have nice malls in Milwaukee and Madison - and a great outlet mall in Kenosha. Beyond that... I got nothin'.

Anyone from WI?

Monica

My yesterdays are all boxed up - and neatly put away.

Hi Charlie:

When you go to lunch with your lawyer (will he eat the shark blue plate special or not out of professional courtesy???), ask him about something called COBRA. You are entitled to it anyway if you have to terminate from STBX's plans, but it is expensive for you and the kids. See about getting STBX to pay all or part of it for some time. And definitely push to have STBX continue to carry the kids regardless. Additionally, your STBX's employer could set up something called a QDRO for you to stay in the plans and avoid the COBRA fees. Either of these things could tide you over until you finish school.

I am going to sign the final divorce papers on Thursday. My ex contacted my lawyer with an address of where he is living in Alberta after his parents received a letter from the lawyer.

Apparently he moved 18 hours away.......nice of him to let me or my lawyer know.

So the process should be over very very soon.

Sigh......

Kid


p.s. I guess I should have started this thread on the divorce forum instead of open.....sorry mods

Kid, we just ain't that picky around here.

Chris.

Kid

Thanks for the insurance info. There is actually a program that is likely much cheaper for me than COBRA, it is called CHCBP and has nearly the same coverage as what I had. My kids will always be on ex's insurance so that isn't a problem.

My lawyer looked over the Complaint I got and said he would send a letter to ex's lawyer saying we wanted the separation agreement incorporated into the divorce decree, they didn't do that in the paperwork that I got and basically the paper waved my right to see the decree -which could be a problem or might not my lawyer said. He said it was probably a standard form but it's best to have it written in.

Charlie