Just wanted to check in. I've got some time tonight to mess around on the computer a bit. H is out working late tonight, kids are watching a movie, and I'm getting into another chat room to take an herbal exam. Things are going well, as well as can be. H has been soooo supportive of me, even through all my rollercoaster rides the past couple of weeks. Fall seems to bring back a lot to me.

We found out through a person who he use to work with that OW is now onto male #4 since H's time with her, in fact #4 just happens to be a guy that she was with before H. H seemed a bit upset about it. I took it to mean that he was jealous, and upset that she was with yet someone else. But he sat me down, realizing that this was going through my head and told me that it was because he never realized that she had been with anyone before him. He never saw anything going on, which upset him even more, because he thought that he "knew" his employees and this just made him realize how blind he was to soo much that was going on on the floor. It actually had nothing at all to do with her personally.

I asked him the other day (still being hung up on the kissing thing - am I as good as her, was she a good kisser, etc), and he said that as far as he's concerned, I'm the only one in his life he's kissed, and that I'm the best. I just looked at him and told him that he's sinking deeper, but that maybe one day I'd believe him. He just smiled and hugged me. Then reminded me again that one day I will trust him again, and until that time came, he'd be waiting. I keep telling him that I'm just afraid of what might happen after that day comes (of falling on my face again). He said that I won't. Again with the "some day I'll believe in it."

Am I too hard on him?

Well, that's about it, except for a lot of crazy stuff with the kids getting ready for school and my brother's wedding coming up.

Jid

Thanks for checking in and giving us an update.

Are you too hard on him? I don't think so. It sounds like you still need reassurance and that's ok.  Ask for it as long as you need it. It also sounds like your husband is patient and willing to talk to you. That's a good sign I believe.

As for him reacting to the OW being with someone else. I remember finding out some things about the OM after our Dday.  I have to admit at that time I was a little jealous that he moved on. But after a time it only served to remind me that he wasn't the person I thought him to be, nor a person that I'd want to be with. My guess is your husband wasn't jealous. But he now sees the OW for how she is, and he wonders how he could ever have been so blinded by her.

Sounds like both of you are moving forward.  

GT

I just love a happy ending. They always get me all choked up.

Seriously, J, it's good to hear you're doing well and that H has had that all important light bulb moment. Good luck in the future.

Jid, can't add anything to what the ladies said, just wanted to say hello and thanks for the update!

Cory

The Three Rules of Happiness: Friends, Freedom and an Analyzed Life - Epicurus