Three months ago my boyfriend cheated on me. I knew it wasn't because they loved eachother or anything. He swears up and down they didn't have sex, and they only kissed, but he couldn't go any further because he only thought of me. I do believe him. I'm not here for people to tell me to get rid of him because hes just a boyfriend and not a husband. I need help on how to cope with it.

Lastnight, we went to a club and SHE was there. It ruined my whole night. Not only did it ruin mine, but it ruined his. I want to change, and I want to get over it. I just don't know the first step to doing it. Please someone help me. I'm finally coming out of my shell of trying to do it myself, and looking for you all to help me. I feel as if im in a deep hole, and I can't get myself out of it. I want to pull myself out more then anything.

T

I might not be the greatest authority on the subject as I have not yet gotten over my boyfriend's cheating. For me, though, the first step was to realize that you don't just get over it in one day, or in three months (I'm at the three month mark too) and it takes a lot of time and communication. You have to ask yourself if you trust him and if he's serious about building a relationship with you. Realize that it's normal to break into fits of insecurity and to need constant reassurance. Take it slow and don't try to rush back to total happiness. Best of luck to you.