I really could use some advice. I am a twenty year old pregnant female, four months, and the father cheated on me for the second time with his ex-girlfriend. I got so mad that I slapped him in the face and kicked him out the door. I normally am not violent and I don't agree with it, but I lost it! He got angry and left. Now I am stuck with his baby. We have talked on the phone and he says that he misses me and that the relationship is not over, that this is just something that we are going through right now at the moment. I don't believe I can trust him, but (here goes the textbook line) I love him so much. What would you do? Thanks

CutieGirl20

Welcome to the group! Sorry that you had a need to find us. I am pretty new to the group & do not pretend to know much. During my first marriage my H cheated on me while I was pregnant. He cheated on me several times in the marriage. Be careful. Also, get tested for STDs. My thought on the situation is he can't care too much because here you are pregnant with his child. It should be a special time in your lives & he should totally be there for love & support. Instead, he's having sex with someone else.Not a very caring person. Only you can decide what is right for you. Just know that there are some great people here who can listen & offer advice

Howdy Crystal,

Welcome to the forum. Sorry you had to find us but you found a great place.

<<<cheated on me for the second time with his ex-girlfriend>>>
He has cheated on you twice already. If you are not married to him I would definately think carefully about walking down the aisle with this guy if he does ask in the future. He needs to do some serious work on himself(i.e counselling) first. Marriage won't fix this. You don't wanna wake up 20 years later only to find he's done it again.

<<<I slapped him in the face >>> Hopefully you know violence on either side is wrong. I know you were upset but don't make the situation worse by bringing violence into the situation.

Go get tested for STD's ASAP. You have to protect yourself and your unborn child. Do not have sex with him.

You need to rest and eat properly. If you are having trouble please see your doc.

<<<I don't believe I can trust him>>>
No you can't. He needs to earn your trust back and that will take time.

<<<What would you do?>>> That's an easy one. Take care of yourself and the baby FIRST. Use this time to think about what you want. What does he need to do for you to even consider taking him back?

Keep posting when/if you need too. We're here for you and the lil one.

Regards,

Tex

"I really could use some advice. I am a twenty year old pregnant female, four months, and the father cheated on me for the second time with his ex-girlfriend. I got so mad that I slapped him in the face and kicked him out the door. I normally am not violent and I don't agree with it, but I lost it! He got angry and left. Now I am stuck with his baby. We have talked on the phone and he says that he misses me and that the relationship is not over, that this is just something that we are going through right now at the moment. I don't believe I can trust him, but (here goes the textbook line) I love him so much. What would you do? Thanks"

Well if it were me and I had to do this over again.......based on the fact this is the second time and you are not yet married.....I would boot his ass out the door and start looking for somebody who deserves you and that wonderful baby of yours. I wish I had done that 15 years ago when my ex husband cheated while we were dating.

BUT I know it isn't that easy! AND you are not me.

As Tex said, take care of yourself and the baby. Eat,sleep and exercise. Try to get out with friends and spend time with family if that makes you feel better.

Unless your BF (I assume?) is willing to look inside himself and do some serious soul searching and break all contact with his ex it will be very hard to heal your relationship. IF he is truly remorseful and is willing to look inside himself and allow you to express your emotions and hurt to him..then maybe you have a chance.

Either way I wouldn't make any rash decisions at this point. Concentrate on you. Welcome to a safe place to vent.