First post of my life, feels awful it had to be this but after reading some threads, I need the help.

Married 9 yrs with 3 kids, first and only woman I've been with.

D-day was 12 months ago, A started 6 months before that. Found out all the details 6 months ago, before that, lots of lies to "save" my feelings. Since D-day, we've tried to move forward 4x, including a CLM job move across the country by me to get a fresh start (and yeah, "runaway" from OM). Turns out WS kept seeing and being with OM, including seeing him last month "to set the record straight" and was supposedly not intimate. With her track record on false starts, how do I believe that. She says she's told him to move on, that she wants to work on her marriage, although she still tells me she has feelings for him and not for me.

First question, what's the best way for WS to break away from OM and what should WS do to re-develop feelings for BS? Seems like this is a pre-requisite to move forward, but what about all these relapses?

Now the trickier part, WS does not act remorseful for all the pain she's caused me, in fact, she's often resentful. It seems I'm working harder to save our marriage than she is, this is insane right? I've tried to walk out but my heart won't let me cuz I still love her. I feel the race is between how much more I can bear and when she will realize what it will take to get this marriage back on track... is this a normal process?

Hi Hurt

One of our moderators copied your post to the "Discovery" board so that you will get more responses.

Many members don't check this board on a consistent basis because we normally only post our original stories on here, as you did, yet post frequently on the others. Welcome

charlie