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  • Too Late for Me, Save Yourselves

    • Posted May 16, 2005 6:30 PM

      TOO LATE FOR ME SAVE YOURSELVES

      ©J.B. Pravda

      INT. BOOK-LINED STUDY-EVE.
      A man in his late 30's has just stopped pacing and rewriting his 'manifesto' suicide 'note'; he has, exhaustedly, slumped into his chair and dialed 911 on speaker. He has closed and locked the study door.
      AVERY MANN
      Hul....lo.....I think I'm close to checking out.....
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Sir,.... I'm having trouble hearing you....you say 'freakin out'?
      AVERY MANN
      Yeah, that too; you taping this?
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Yessir, regulations require.....
      (cutoff)
      AVERY MANN
      Good, it'll save the few who might give a shit, and the world at large thru the mediapimps who play it endlessly for a day or so, the trouble of reading it, or me writing it!
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Hey, blame that one on freedom of the press......
      AVERY MANN
      Yeah, to manipulate and lie for their corporate masters!
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Ok, let's talk, you and me. Hell with the media, an all that jazz.....don't get me wrong, I'm down with what you're sayin, been livin it, Mr.....?
      AVERY MANN
      (chilling out)
      Mann, Avery Mann.
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      You live at 1216 Wright Way, Elysium suburbs?
      AVERY MANN
      (indignant again)
      That what your high tech files say, hey, must be true......why don't they use their technology to empower the 3/4 out there who don't even have a phone, or a decent place to put one....hey, I'm living in Hotel California, ok?
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      'You can check out any time you please, just can't ever leave', right?
      AVERY MANN
      Amen; look, you trying to manipulate me?
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      (tough but firm)
      Look, Avery, you preachin to the choir; you're a educated man, you read alot, right?
      AVERY MANN
      Who cares, what has it done for me except cause all this grief, called 'awareness'?
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      'To be or not to be...', that ain't the question, you hear; what did it ever do for that whiner who had it all----smart, status, great wardrobe, velvet this and that.......what'd all that ponderin in the palace tower do for him and those he cared for.....messed up that gal's head something fierce, all cause he saw thru her daddy!
      AVERY MANN
      (into it)
      What about his best bud, Horatio...'sweet prince' my ass, yes man to a hand wringer......
      (cutoff)
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      So, you down with the fact that I am not no Horatio?
      (pauses and hears silence as consent)
      Good; now, look here: mad as Hell done been done, baby, burn it down been done....you need to get peaceful if you wanna see peace out there, you hear, Avery?
      AVERY MANN
      I'm listening..........
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Ever read Sartre?
      AVERY MANN
      (smug)
      Yeah, 'Hell is other people'.......
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      'Existence precedes essence', ok; do the math.....you totally free, even inside corporate hegemony, got it, and that's givin you all this angst, ok.....welcome to the only race, the human kind.
      AVERY MANN
      (flummoxed)
      I didn't....get your name, m'am.
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Well, now that you actin all peaceful, I supposed I can tell ya; it's Teresa.
      AVERY MANN
      Teresa, nice name.....
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      You got that right, Avery; named for the Saint.
      AVERY MANN
      (self-satisfied)
      Not yet, she isn't, Vatican politics.
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Now, don't pay that no mind; she's already got that halo, doan be needin no human stuff. All peaceful every day, moving mountains.......you hear bout her in Beirut during worst of dat mess?
      AVERY MANN
      Yes, she walked through a gun battle, they stopped, just like that, didn't know she was coming, they begged her not to go.
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      See how weak 'they' really are? Peace beats war like aces high, gotta walk that walk, at's all.
      AVERY MANN
      You make it sound so simple.
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Honey, been livin that walk, why I do this work; now, you want mine to be a growth industry, just keep ponderin, droppin out fore you get started.
      AVERY MANN
      Sounds like I need boots.
      (laughing nervously)
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      If 'they made for walkin, stomping all over lying and cheatin, like the song say.
      AVERY MANN
      Teresa, you ever free for lunch?
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Don't know, not sposed ta fraternize, but, anybody knows bout St. T, guess an exception can be made.
      AVERY MANN
      It's a date!
      CRISIS OPERATOR
      Just one catch: the Mr. T. deal: I pity the fool who doan listen to me!
      They both laugh for a moment, Avery hangs up and heads upstairs to get his 'boots'.
      SHOT: WE SEE HIS HAND TURNING THE KNOB, UNLOCKING THE DOOR, THEN SEE/HEAR EXPLOSIVE BLAST.
      ATTENDING PHYSICIAN
      How the hell did you get him here so quick? He's got a chance, thanks to you.
      POLICE OFFICER
      That's the thing about it, got a dispatch call from 911, saying that suspicious vibes received from someone they called 'the Bootleg Killer' being in his neighborhood.
      SHOT: WE TRAVEL THROUGH HIS HOUSE, POV/HAND-HELD UP TO REMAINS OF SHOTGUN RIGGED BY 'AVERY' ? , 'FORGOTTEN' BY HIM IN HIS ELATION........
      O.S. DISEMBODIED VOICE
      Oh, well, can't win them all; I'm off.......
      Music up, Stones: 'Glad to meet you, hope you guessed my name'....

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