WORD PLAY
'A Play on Words......'
By J.B. Pravda(c)
INT. COCKTAIL LOUNGE OF RESTORED 'RETRO' SILENT FILM PALACE-EVE
Two older male theatrical types, long since past their stage prime as masters of the mimetic arts---reduced now to playing Vegas as Cirque de Soleil clown extras, not to mention the odd convention as greeters---these purists are feeling especially out of phase with the times and crass modernity. It is intermission at a silent film festival/revival. They've been together (gender preference is uncertain and left that way) so long they are able to complete one another's necessarily terse verbalizations.
MAN ONE
Thoughts?
MAN TWO
Many.
MAN ONE
(sighs worshipfully as he speaks)
Chaplain......
MAN TWO
So...mimetic.
MAN ONE
Genetic.
MAN TWO
Sound hurt.
MAN ONE
No question.
MAN TWO
(growing anger)
Words!
MAN ONE
Affected the work.....
MAN TWO
Caveman.....
MAN ONE
Did fine.....
MAN TWO
Without them.
USHER
(smiles pityingly)
Gentlemen, we're starting......
They go through an almost habitual yet comical Alfonse/Gastogne routine, even for the simple unnoticed way of standing and proceeding into the theatre again. There is a sad elegance to their exaggerated sensibilities expressed via gestures alone. End of Scene One.
Scene Two
INT. DARKENED THEATRE-EVE
The two men are facing the audience, which serves as the screen; the only lighting is such as to Halloween-like illuminate their facial features markedly (flashlight on chin); they proceed to react with every one of the many muscles of the human face so movingly and, crucially for effect, in exact synchronization with the other, without looking at each other at all; we see darkened outlines of others behind them in theatre seats for effect only. The music is, of course, classical and largely piano and string, from offstage, in sync with the facial expressions, vice versa. From pathos to bathos, they capture it; this lasts for about 2.5 to 3 minutes. End of Scene Two.
Scene Three
INT. RETIREMENT VILLAGE/ACTORS' APARTMENT HOME-DAY
Back to modern reality, with its blaring TVs and radios---most of the residents are, of course, hard of hearing. Throughout the 'day' we see the two throwbacks recoil from a series of encounters which cumulatively cause them consternation/revulsion: this is shown via gesticulation and facial expressions, seemingly in mimetic whiteface the effect of which is created by both subtle makeup and lighting innovations. The situations are without dialogue, except for a 'soundtrack' of cacaphony, comprised of snipets of electronic speakers and intermittent shouts. At the end of the scene, one sees an advertisement in the newspaper for resident teachers at the prominent old school for the deaf: this is made known to the audience via voiceover from offstage couched as the 'reading aloud' voice of the two of them, reading the ad to themselves---key=two voices in perfect sync!
Scene Four
INT. HEADMASTER'S OFFICE OF SCHOOL FOR DEAF-DAY
They are in a meeting with the headmaster.
HEADMASTER
Gentlemen, I cannot tell you what it has meant to us here---why, in just two short months our enrollment and success rates are at record levels, not to mention the donations from various benefactors. Allow me to tell you that your techniques have brought to life in our students the lost art of, if you will, body language, far beyond mere sign language. Is there anything, anything at all to make your stay here more appealing to you?!
The two of them take turns hand writing a note, then pass it to the headmaster.
HEADMASTER (cont'd)
(he reads it)
Of course, I see.....quite right, it is best you not fall back on verbalizations.
The two men rise, gracefully and mime out that they must prepare for the day's classes: this should be bittersweet, only warmly comical, sentimental and moving, as misdirection for the unexpected ironic joke upcoming. End of Scene Four.
Scene Five
INT. CLASSROOM OF SCHOOL FOR THE DEAF-DAY
It is later that day and the two men are in their element, and in full swing, classic form when a young male student stands, frantically signing, translated by one of the men to the other who is not schooled in sign language.
MAN ONE
'.......you, you just think you're so accomplished.....yes, accomplished......'
(turns head to man two)
'I have sat here for weeks, at first impressed and then it hit me......'
The young man continues signing but man one does not continue translating, a look of shocked paralysis comes over his expressive face. Then, after about another 30 seconds, the young man flips them off with the universal 'bird' finger, and storms out.
MAN TWO
Well, what just happened......
MAN ONE
(deadpan, fey)
He told us to.....get fucked....
MAN TWO
I mean the rest of it!
MAN ONE
Man one dismisses the class with a single gesture, now very self-consciously.
MAN ONE (cont'd)
Sit down.
MAN TWO
Well?
MAN ONE
Chaplain....
MAN TWO
What?
MAN ONE
It really hurts.
MAN TWO
(arm around shoulder)
Little shit.
MAN ONE
Not that, it was.......magical, really...
(entranced momentarily)
Great mimetic promise......
MAN TWO
Huh?
MAN ONE
(tearfully)
You don't sign: he said....we were sorry Chaplains.....
MAN TWO
(puzzled)
What should we...do?
MAN ONE
(lightbulb in his head)
Let's go!
MAN TWO
(similar revelation)
Yes, let's go........I see it now, it's a...sign, what we've been waiting for......
MAN ONE
(grinning broadly)
Indeed, a sign, from....HIM!; we go, to spread the....word!
They stand, and leave;in homage to Beckett's Waiting for Godot, they purposely avoid Chaplainesquery and now become theatre of the absurd purists, using words, albeit frugally, as their crowning effect, above mere mimetics.