I wrote this poem to myself after prayer this morning.

Most verses are bathed with tears and come from the bottom of my blissful hurting heart. The tears are tears of joy and sorrow from a heart that is fully resigned to the will of God. A heart that is by grace free from all sinful attitudes and self pity. A heart that is joyful and full of glory, happy and praising, yet cries with sorrow.

I am a pretty closed person and don't let to many emotions escapes. Perhaps the street has left me to hard on the outside. But inside I am a little child. I weap one moment and rejoice the next. I forget my sorrows and laugh at some small thought the Lord puts into my mind. God has such a huge sense of humor.

So I thought perhaps it would be God's will to show my human side that you could not only rejoice with me when I rejoice but sorrow with me when I sorrow.

But ready, all I hope is that this poem can bless just one hurting soul. That someone can receive just a small portion of the blessing God gave me in writting this short piece.

I love and pray for you all on his forum and hope some how I can share with you the life of Christ that is in my soul.

[I want to note that my trails are very small compared to the brethren we read of in Martyrs Mirror. But it is normal to think that the trials you are going through are big. I glading embrace my small trials. While it hurts to be set aside, falsly accused, threatened to be put out of a fellowship of people you love and banished to hell, it is nothing compared to what Jesus and the MM believers when through.]

Here's my poem. I hope you like it.

OTVC Trials

Embracing trials with open arms,
They waft us up above.
They are the chariots sent from God,
To purify our love.

They come from friends and family,
Those that hurt the most.
They cause us to walk alone,
To ride with angel host.

Embrace your lot in this life,
Twill all soon be past.
Do those things that please the Lord,
Not heeding trials blast.

Plunge your soul with holy bliss,
And glory in the storm.
Your spirit free from your flesh,
Trials no longer mourn.

Tis the way to selfless life,
Set free while here at last.
Driven to the Word on knees,
Our faith increases fast.

This faith that causes us to stand,
To quench each fiery dart.
The victory o'er the world gives,
To those of pure in heart.

Oh Saviour dear, the victory is,
So very bitter sweet.
Free from attitudes of sin,
Your holy flesh we eat.

Seeking from this vile flesh,
From sinful world we hurl.
Released to your bossom sweet,
In dream our mind does swirl.

Oh what on that very day,
The bliss we all will share.
When trials pass our way no more,
From earth away we tear.

Oh courage you do gracious give,
The fight to onward press.
Time is short the work is much,
Souls we need to bless.

With vineyard work we to do,
Your grace we do implore.
The kingdom message we sound aloud,
Til time shall be no more.

Qwerty 04-14-08.

Qwerty,

I got some advice for you. You need to go find some people that believe like you. I don't say this to spite you. I don't say this because I want or think you should quit writing. There's few here that have the passion and devotion you have for what you believe. Zeal is the life of belief. Without zeal beliefs and claims are the most deceptive and hypocritical. But passion and contrition is not a sign of righteousness. Passion also has to be run through the wringer. Because there is a light that has been transformed. You're either way more religious or way more spiritual then most people here. Some people here wouldn't walk across the street to stand for what they believe and claim. It might exclude someone that claims to be a Christian. But they'll shout at you from across the street in the safety of their own.

"Thou shalt think for yourselves."

Brent

sucked.


♪*•.¸¸ ♥¸¸¸.•*♪

I like it too. You certainly have a way with words.

This verse:
Embracing trials with open arms,
They waft us up above.
They are the chariots sent from God,
To purify our love.

particularly resonates with me. I'm just not sure how a person gets to a place they can embrace trials with open arms. We have been studying Ps. 90 at our house, which contains the words "Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, for as many years as we have seen trouble" acknowledging God sent the trials, but trusting it has been for their refining and there will be joy to follow sort of echos your thought.

Now for real life, how does joy follow the diagnosis of terminal cancer, for instance.

<Now for real life, how does joy follow the diagnosis of terminal cancer, for instance.>
This is a 2 fold thing here. Unless God is in it and us, it is kinda hard to find joy in this kind of thing.

We have just watched a family lose their little baby girl and come thru it rejoicing in her life and the time they had with her.

When my mom was diagnosed 10 yrs ago, that was one of the hardest times in our life. And yet there were many good things that came from it. My mother went thru 8 weeks of horrendous experimental treatment to see if there was a slim chance of survival. It allowed her to live for 15 mos, instead of the original diagnosis of 3 mos. She was still able to walk a yr later and be at the wedding of her youngest son. During the time she was in treatment she was able to live in a resort area in a beautiful place, (for free because my dad was able to install the window air conditioners in the rooms that the owner had purchased but couldn't install), she would have never been able to enjoy, even though part of it was a bad experience, she came home with good memories and new friends. Because of the situation and their living, from one week after her diagnosis, till she died, their only actual income was $400 a month from a rental trailer. They had a dairy farm and the milking cows were sold after someone kept them for them for a month and went for only $100-$400 apiece, a great loss at the time. they still had a number of animals to keep in feed left also. But they were kept in food, her care was all paid for and when she died ,there were no extra debts left. Even though it took the whole of the inheritance she had recieved just a yr before, the expenses they incured far exceeded that and yet God provided it all.
Because of it, I have children that are much more considerate of others and daughters that are able to work with older folks and actually enjoy them.
I can still remember coming home for a short time just a day before Mom died and coming over the hill above our house and looking out at a clear blue, cloudless sky and finding my self suddenly singing "What a beautiful day for the Lord to come again".

We are human and we tend to look on the loss side, and yet if we let God have it,( which we tend to hold onto things, instead of letting him have it,) He will provide a place of joy in the journey, hope for the trial and strength for the day. Some times we have to look for it, but he will give it.



Love and prayers, Locklady

adiel
"I'm just not sure how a person gets to a place they can embrace trials with open arms."

Well either we embrace trials or they will embrace us. If we let them embrace us we will be tempted to become bitter, envious, jealous, hateful, resentful, pity ourselves and can succumb to those temptation and it is a very bad place to be in. I know a good number of people that have left OTVCs and you can see their lives have been destroyed and eaten up by the bitterness.

Trials will come no better what. It is best that we embrace them and allow them to drive you to you knees for prayer and the Word. This will increase your faith (Rom 10:17, Jud 1:20) which will give you more and better victory to stand (2Cor 1:24) better victory over the unlawful desires of the flesh and mind (1Joh 5:4) and enable you too better quench all the firely darts of the evil -- people and devils (Eph 6:16).

Faith – you build faith by hearing the Word of God (Rom 10:17) and by praying in the Holy Spirit (Jud 1:20); it is by faith that you stand (2Cor 1:24), by faith that you have victory over the world (1Joh 5:4), by faith that you quench all the fiery darts of the wicked (Eph 6:16), and you are kept by the power of God from sin thought faith (1Pet 1:5); by faith through prayer you have boldness and access with confidence (Eph 3:12) to the throne of God where you will find grace to help in time of need (Heb 4:16); the more time you spend in scriptures and prayer the more spiritual victory you will have.

"We have been studying Ps. 90 at our house, which contains the words "Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, for as many years as we have seen trouble" acknowledging God sent the trials, but trusting it has been for their refining and there will be joy to follow sort of echos your thought."

I would hold that God allows trials to come. I don't hold that he puts them on us. Mans days are few and full of trouble and no one is excempt from trials, saint or sinner. If we can learn to embrace them knowing them will work good in us it will help us.

Trials – don't think is strange that you will have trials (1Pet 4:12); trials will work patience in you (Jam 1:3); the day of trial and testing will reveal what your spiritual building is made of, when your spiritual building still abides after the trial or test you will be rewarded, when trials show you were building wrong rejoice and start building right (1Cor 3:12); trials don't bring out the worst in you, they show what was there all along.

Thoughts – the mind is the battle ground (2Cor 10:3); Jesus knows your thoughts so be careful what you think (Luk 6:8); fix your thoughts on the things of God and not on earthly things (Phi 3:19); don’t think of yourself highly (Rom 12:3); love God with all your mind (Mat 22:37); be careful to not speak what ever thoughts come to your mind (Pro 29:11); be transformed by the renewing of your mind (Rom 12:2); don’t give your mind to think about the pleasure of the flesh (Rom 8:5); think on things that are true, honest, just, pure, lovely, of good report, virtuous, and worthy of praise (Phi 4:8); you can through the power of God cast down imaginations and bring every thought into control (2Cor 10:4-5); memorize scriptures and meditate on them when you are presented with impure thoughts; evil thoughts are not sin they are temptations (Heb 4:15); quote the Word of God to fight temptation of the mind (Mat 4:4).

"Now for real life, how does joy follow the diagnosis of terminal cancer, for instance."

We must be resolved to face death with victory. Our life is one for preparing to fact the last enemy which is death. Joy is a deep seating trust in God that helps us smile in your heart in the storm. It is contentment with our lot. Godliness with contentment is great gain.

I look at it this way. In 100 years from now it will not matter if I died at 50 or at 80. We all have to die and it is something we need to embrace. We need to become as spiritually minded as we can and to start leaving this earth already even before we get old or encounter a sickness that is unto death. We need to get our heart in heaven by storing our treasure there. We need to work in the Lord vineyard and labor for souls. We need to grow to hate this wicked world and to hate the vile body that we live in.

This is some thing I am working in my own life. Becoming more heavenly minded. Having my mind on the coming of Christ daily and looking to the sky each morning to watch for his coming.

Spiritual Marks – victory over all sinning (1Joh 5:18); pure in heart (Mat 5:8, Act 15:8,9); loving God with all your heart and your neighbor as yourself (Mar 12:30,21); doing to others as you would have them do to you (Luk 6:31); strong prayer life and devotional life (Luk 18:1); carefulness in conduct (2Cor 7:11); humble in mind (Act 20:19), meek in spirit (1Cor 4:21); lowly in attitude (Eph 4:2); kind one to another (Eph 4:32); having sound speech (Tit 2:8); holy hatred of sin (Rom 12:9); not braggarts or boasters (2Tim 3:2); patient with the faults of others (1Cor 13:7); submissive one to another (1Pet 5:5); meek when correcting others (2Tim 2:25); spiritually minded (Rom 8:5,6); hungering and thirsting after more of God (Mat 5:6); increasing in the fruit of the Spirit (2Pet 1:8); not conformed to this world (Rom 12:2); victory over unlawful desires of the flesh, eyes, and mind (1Joh 2:16); prayerful through out the day (Eph 6:18); forgiving towards one another (Eph 4:32); true love towards fellow believers (1Pet 1:22); serving others (Gal 6:10); do all things with love (1Cor 16:14); study the scriptures (2Tim 2:15); carry a burden for the lost; modesty in dress (1Tim 2:9); not critical but search for the good in others; watching for and earnestly desiring the return of Christ (2Pet 3:11).

The last point is very important -- watching for and earnestly desiring the return of Christ.

I think also we need to spend time meditating on death, the coming of Christ etc.

Meditation – mediate daily on the following. In the morning that this may be your last day; in the evening you may not awake up to a new day; that Christ may come today and call the world into judgment; that the unsaved you have been sharing Christ with may die today; that others will be watching your conduct today; on your need to live a life worthy of professing the name of Christ; on the areas in your life where you need the most spiritual help; on the love of God for your soul; on the price Christ paid to redeem you; on the sufferings of Christ on the cross; of the debt you owe God for saving your soul; of your love for the Savior; that all material blessings will be left here when you die; on the stewardship that you must give on that last day; on how to please the Savior; on where you would be without Christ; on the all the victories God has given you; on the pains of hell; that you have a enemy that is trying to draw you back into the world.

Hmmm, very thought provoking, Q. I can glean things there that are strengthening me for the phone call probably later today giving the results of a loved one's biopsy.

adiel
A couple of additional thoughts came to my mind that may be useful. When we get a sickness unto death it is really a blessing. It lets us know we are about to die and that we can start preparing to die. It is those that die suddenly that were not prepared that are in worse state.

Also I think perhaps it would be a blessing to die younger and what you have a sound mind and not when you are old and unable to think clearly.

Another things is if a saved person was to die today they would not want to come back. Every one wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die.

I am not Church of God, but do appreciate your poem. Learning to embrace loss of self is truly gain. God bless you and am encouraged by your transformation through your storm. Blessings!

Hello!

I appreciated your poem. I also agree with your assessment of death. I do not fear death at all. The next thing will be awakening to the trumpets of the Second Coming!

I also appreciate your less judgmental writing this time around...

Haven't opened COG in months, I'm bored today at work, open it and damn, what do I get? A 2 year old post by
Qwerty. Who the hell would revive a more than 2 year old post by Qwerty? Well probably He himself, maybe his ole lady, his kids? Cowabunga, COG has gone to hell if Qwerty has to be resurrected!

I really enjoyed your sharing your mother's terminal cancer experience.

I too am so very grateful for those last months of a terminal diagnosis...that drew me and my siblings closer to my mother...and lastly established a closeness among me and my siblings that I/we never had before....which has continued to grow for 15 years.

I find this amazing in a way...because I am not in "the church" and those close siblings...are.