Every now and then you'll run across a situation I used to not be able to figure out. People would repel from you and shrink back from you after you said or done something, and you were dumbfounded not knowing why. Well it happened enough to me that I finally put my finger on it. They had interpreted what I said or done completely different than what I meant it, and almost without fail, pervertedly or as negative as possible, showing where their mind was and how it worked.
I know exactly what you mean. Been there, done that. But, I learned a few things over the years that might help.
First, communication between humans is only 20% verbal. 80% of communication is contained in body language, tone of voice, and voice inflection. Therefore, we not so much hear what another person is saying but rather perceive what the whole package is telling us.
This is my theory on communication. If we are misunderstood, then that which we communicated verbally was not substantiated by the rest of our communication, i.e. body language etc. It is possible that we conveyed a subconscience message through body language that we were not consciencely aware of. The listener may have become confused by the mixed message of the voice saying one thing while the rest of the package is saying something else entirely. Therefore, they accept the perception which speaks the loudest; the 80 percent of the communication that is non-verbal.
Like I said, this is only a theory. I would like to perceive other opinions.
Orig. I think you are right about the body language but I think Brent is on to something a bit different. What I've learned is that people interpret what they hear according to their experiences or attitudes. For example I get into a lot of awkward conversations with other parents lately. We all like to discuss our children but a lot of children in their mid to late twenties are still completely unestablished. That's in contrast to most of us parents who were building a family life in our early and mid twenties. When I ask about these unestablished children the awkwardness sets in. But I'm not judgemental at all and even think that getting established later is probably a good thing and it will happen eventually. Still because of how the parent thinks, not because of how I think, I sometimes get the strong message that the subject is taboo.
That's exactly what I meant. I talk my experience. If you know the other person well enough, you can dumb down your experience and talk their experience and everything will stay cool, I assure you. I do it!
But if you don't know the other person and are true to your experience, you may get some strange looks. They may even avoid you from that point on.
Brent
Back in the day when I was in my twenties, I dabbled a little in controlled substances. One day while high, I had a very clear experience with meeting God. When I told the Holdeman staff that one...
Talk about strange looks...
OS, One day while high, I had a very clear experience with meeting God.
I like the way the book "The Shack" puts it.
Jesus speaking, "I travel all roads to find you"...
I had a cousin who had a very real encounter with God while "high" and it entirely changed his life. He is one of the most "in love with Jesus" people that I know and that was over ten years ago.
It was not a fearful thing for him but an intense encounter with a loving God.
It began in the morning with a song coming back to his memory while in the shower "Is It Well With My Soul". He said I don't know. Later that day after he smoked part of a joint and the song came back to him and he answered the same way.
Then he had a vision where God told him, He was doing all the wrong things for all the wrong reasons. He said he had never experienced pure love till that day.
He has never been the same. He is so in love with Jesus. Not out of fear but because of Love.
There is way more to his testimony.
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