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Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009 at 9:58 AM
sugarnspice63  (Login sugarnspice63)

 
I just signed up on this forum. I never joined the church, but I grew up Holdeman. Just wondering who all posts here?

 
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calledoutPTL
(Login erv123)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 10:15 AM 

Welcome aboard. My spouse and myself have been e'd for about 30 years. A lot of the holdeman's don't want their names posted so some don't say. But some acknowledge the fact they are holdemans. calledoutPTL

 
 

Fred
(Login bawar)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 11:08 AM 

Howdy and welcome to our forum!



A lot of members give this forum a 'cursory glance' or maybe even read some or all of the posts daily just to keep in touch with happenings, but this forum is not endorsed by the CGCM. Members and exed are welcome here and in fact invited. The right to remain anonymous is a first rule here for the members, to protect them from the ordained staff that would put them in trouble if it were found out about their participation here. There are some people here that don't really know much about the CGCM, except what they have learned here.



I used to be a member coming from the outside they sort of painted a picture of a pretty house until I joined, and after that I was having some dire questions about the way the CGCM would discipline my peers to get us to fit into their little program.



Basically, the preachers would lie about their victims, by putting in a few choice points of church incorrectness (similar in nature to the opposite of political incorrectness) regarding unconference behavior.



In other words the preacher would speak evil of the victim to our peers, without first confronting the victim and asking him or her to cease the questionable behavior by pointing to a bible verse that demanded obedience. My being a manager of people, I "smelled a rat" and was well aware of his techniques, and realized that since he did it to me, he also did it to others which accounted for the gossip waves that flowed through our little Zion of anti-love, and fallen countenance of it's victims.



And by that mathematics, I realized that he "ran off" about 13 families in the few years I was here.



He would plant evil reports that were shaded or half truths, made to make his "victim" look bad, and his evil conference vision (legalism) look "good". Then after he got half or more of the church speaking evil of his victim, then he called the victim in and confronted him with the gossip he planted, and they would be so tormented by the manipulation that they would move away.



His motive was conformity by pressure. This is of little difference that what the voodoo witchdoctors would do in Africa. They would plant the curse, and then cultivate it, and then when the victim reacted to the community, he would be forced to come to the witchdoctor for a miraculous cure" by the blessing of the practitioner of the dark arts, or suffer the consequences.





What happened to me is I would chase the rumors, and find the preacher at the end each time!



And he would lie to the people I exposed his actions to. I felt a need to to say it once and that provably, because he would tell me one thing, and the others another, so I wanted the accountability of an open forum.



Those liars thrive on the darkness of unaccountability, because they are workers of darkness!





I invited the preachers to post in here and a few come in and say their peace on occasion, usually they post anonymously which is cool with me, but the one that caused me to leave them would consider it a sin to be on a church INTERNET forum, but not a sin to speak evil of a parishioner and run him off or ex him by his reaction to the gossip he planted!



At any rate they later got sick of trying to corral me and put me in the chute so he finally got them to "put me on repentance" for some sin or other they pretend I was willfully participating in, and at that point I told them to 'take a hike" and left them.



There were a couple of other Internet sites, but they weren't really set up to protect the questioning holdies, so the the holdies sort of ended up here. And because of that this site sort of became the one that most everyone uses.



I am the Host of this site, and there are two moderators, one is Mutterload, she is an ex, and one is "holdemaner" who is a member and a well respected regular on this site but posts as another name to make it so the moderator-ship is not exposed to the staff endangering membership.



Our rules are pretty simple, basically following the rules of any normal forum for decency, and the protection of anonymity of the cgcm members. There is a page of rules somewhere on this site.



If you start a thread, you can ask the moderators to pull any offending posts on your threads, and the moderator may do that or pull the whole thread, or simply pull the offending posts and then lock the thread.





    
This message has been edited by bawar on Jan 10, 2009 11:14 AM


 
 

Joe
(Login 21blueroses)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 12:37 PM 

I grew up in the Church of God in Christ Mennonite, but never joined. I rarely post here, and I haven't spent a lot of time reading the forum recently. When one lives away from Holdeman societies for long enough, much of the drama surrounding the Mennonites is forgotten. However, it still resonates in all of us. The forum can, at times help us to remember where we came from, why we do some of the things we do so differently, and the things that we set out to change and have long forgotten.

 
 
paris
(Login .pariskat)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 7:13 PM 

Hey sugar,

I have never been a holdeman. I was a foster child in a holdeman family when I was very young between 1962-63. I had wanted to meet my foster mom but when I found her she was 99 years old. I never met her but I did write her a letter and heard back from her. I have a pen pal relationship with a couple of her children,,(which reminds me it's my turn to write).

I just happend onto the forum when I heard that they were holdeman Mennonite. I thought a Mennonite was a Mennonite, but I guess there is a difference.

I have learned a lot about "religion" in general here on the forum. I always just thought we were all Christians and everyone was OK with that, but I guess throughout the world there is a "pecking order" for God's attention..

enjoy your stay,,Oh yeah sometimes I swear and I'm kind of sarcastic.


peck·ing order (pkng)

2. The social hierarchy in a flock of domestic fowl in which each bird pecks subordinate birds and submits to being pecked by dominant birds.

 
 
Lark
(Login larkagain)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 8:55 PM 

Sugar.. I am not a member. My parents were members until I was in the third grade. So grew up around some of the H culture especially the avoidance part.

 
 

Fred
(Login bawar)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 9:18 PM 

Paris, fly with the geese! they take turns in the lead!


The Goose Story

Author Unknown

Next fall, when you see geese heading south for the winter, flying along in 'V formation, think about what science has learned about why they fly that way.

As each bird flaps its wings, it creates uplift for the bird immediately following it.

By flying in a 'V formation, the whole flock can fly at least 71% farther than if each bird flew on its own.

Perhaps people who share a common direction can get where they are going quicker and easier if they cooperate.

When a goose falls out of formation, it feels the resistance of trying to go it alone, and quickly gets back into formation to take advantage of flying with the flock.
If we have as much sense as a goose, we will work with others who are going the same way as we are.

When the lead goose gets tired, he rotates back in the wing and another goose flies on the point.

It pays to take turns doing hard jobs for our group.

The geese honk from behind to encourage those up front to keep up their speed.

Finally, (get this) when a goose weakens or is wounded and falls out of formation, two geese fall out and follow him down to help and protect him.

They stay with him until he is either able to fly or until he is dead, and they then set our on their own or with another formation until they catch up with the group.

If we had the sense of a goose, we would stand by each other like that.

© Copyright 2003. Galt Western Personnel Ltd.

 
 
GM
(Login GMman1)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 10 2009, 9:44 PM 

Sugarnspice, I am an H member. I have been known to post here once in a while. I became aware of this forum on Mar./'07. It has been an interesting and informative experiencegetting a better glimpse of the H church from the other side(the expelled)where one can better understand all the ramifications and the ugliness of the avoidance, the right or wrong of it. I have appreciated the history lessons of the H church from the beginning as I knew very little about it before. Also the open dialogue and the exchange of ideas, the various interpretations of scripture, and the general experiences of life which makes it such an interesting connection.
So stick around and add yours. There's always room for one more.

 
 

Stan
(Login DrSkeptic)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 11 2009, 8:25 AM 

Sugarnspice,

I grew up in the Holdeman church and was expelled in my twenties, back in the early 80s. I then went to college and got a degree in Engineering. I married a woman from the world and we have a teenage daughter. I live away from the Holdeman community, but go back to visit my H parents and siblings several times a year. I visit this forum because I enjoy the connection with others who are familiar with my background.

 
 
TR
(Login anaverageh)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 11 2009, 5:18 PM 


I am a younger CGCM member, married with kids...

 
 

Holdemaner
(Login Holdemaner)
Moderators

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 11 2009, 7:34 PM 

hmmmmmmm....



"and one is "holdemaner" who is a member and a well respected regular on this site but posts as another name to make it so the moderator-ship is not exposed to the staff endangering membership."



Thats a pretty interesting way to put it although I believe you may be right wink.gif



Welcome sugarnspice...As the token holdeman moderator I welcome you to the forum of the bitter and offended x's and the disgruntled and fencehugging holdies.Jump in with both feet and liven the ole forum up a bit with something other than the cowboy philosophy we have been choking down lately.



har har hardy har





    
This message has been edited by Holdemaner on Jan 11, 2009 7:36 PM


 
 
paris
(Login .pariskat)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 11 2009, 8:01 PM 

Fred,,that was a beautiful story, it gave me "goose bumps",,what a beautiful picture it painted.



 
 

Mark
(Login myfathersson)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

January 12 2009, 4:24 PM 

I am XH (not bitter or offended) living daily with Jesus.

 
 
Howie
(Login Howie7)
Registered Users

Are Most Members ex-H

January 13 2009, 9:32 AM 

I am exed - So is my most beautiful wife. I have been bitter I have seen many people exed for many reasons and I pray daily for the people who are misled there although I suspect many of them may be saved. However I believe God will hold some of them responsible for what they teach.

 
 
paris
(Login -pariskat)

Re: Are most members here ex-Holdemans?

February 18 2011, 10:28 PM 

d

 
 
 
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