ABOUT GROWING OLDER...
First -- Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about your age and start BRAGGING about it.
Second -- The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.
Third -- Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people to know why I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of the roads weren't paved.
Fourth -- You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.
Fifth -- One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day has been.
Sixth -- Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.
Seventh -- Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks, it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf.
And finally -- If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you are old.
Thanks to Alf for these senior jokes:
http://www.silvercitizen.com/senior-citizen-jokes.html
"Who's On First?"
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Both
could barely see over the dashboard. As they were
cruising along, they came to an intersection. The
stoplight was red, but they went on through it.
The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself, "I
must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went
through a red light."
After a few more minutes, they came to another
intersection, and the light was red again. Again, the
car zipped right through it.
This time the woman in the passenger seat was almost
sure that the light had been red, but was really
concerned that she was losing it. She was getting
nervous and decided to pay very close attention to the
road and the next intersection to see what was going on.
At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was
definitely red, and they zoomed right through it!
She turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred! Did
you know we just went through three red lights in a row?
You could have killed us!"
Mildred turned to her and said, "Oh mercy, am I
driving?"
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