Craigs thoughts - and mine

Just read Craig's message - I haven't been to the site for a few weeks and his message just made me think - I lost my Mum in April - It was a sudden death although she was 82 and she died in my arms - I tried to revive her but couldn't - the paramedics stopped me when they arrived - we sat with her all night until the funeral directors came and took her away - that whole night is etched on my soul and I too have nightmares constantly which replay the events over and over - what is worse is going to bed at night and those few minutes before you fall asleep - I think about some of the things that happened - I am starting to wonder if that part is ever going to get better or go away - almost a form of post traumatic stress I suppose - Has anyone out there experienced this? I cannot get beyond the actual death and start to think positive thoughts about my Mum - I miss her so much but I can't seem to think about her in any way other than what happened that night - I just keep thinking I should have done something differently - Lyn