Hello

I have never done anything like this before but I am feeling so sad and so alone and don't know where to turn, I lost my husband very suddenly on 12th October 2006, we have lived abroad for the last 17 yrs, Phillipines, Sri Lanka, India, China, have now relocated back to the uk, have managed to find myself a new house and a new job but still feel so alone and still miss him so much, I did not think that the pain would be this intense, I still cry for him every day miss him more and more as the days go on, I can't see anything positive in losing him and I can't see what the future holds, just miss him so much, I don't even know why I am writing this guess I feel I need to reach out to some one somwhere.

Gina

YOu have done the right thing in writing to this forum People here are so understanding, and will give you lots of support. I know for certain, because since my wife died in April, I had a very bad time at first, but the help I had here gave me hope, and I am, also pleased that I have been able to do the same for some others. Please share your feelings with us. We have been through it and really do understand, something your real life friends may not be able to do, and even if they do sympathise, they often don't know what to say. Thanks for writing. You are amongs friends here.
Love,
Derry

Hello Derry

Thank you so much for responding, just hearing from some one who has bothered to reply has made me feel that people do know and that people can reach out, I can almost feel a touch, I think I miss that most, my husbands touch, I have read some of your other messages and know you have been through some terrible times but it's sounds like you are coming through them and hopefully starting a new and wonderful phase in your life, I just can't see mine at all, I have lost 2 brothers, a brother in law, 2 uncles, a sister in law and my husband, since October I have lost 4 close members of my family but it's the loss of my hubby I feel most, he was my best friend and I really did think we would grow old together now all I see is emptiness, what can I do but get up in the mornings and get through another day, i know I won't last long in my new job as my mind is elsewhere I can only hope that one day it will get easier but I think reality has just set in for me I always was a late starter and I have now realised that David is never coming back and I have to learn to bear that some how.

I'm sorry that you've had to find this site but glad that you did - everyone is very friendly and supportive and of course understand everything you are going through. I lost my dad suddenly in April this year and still can't believe it, still think there is an element of shock. So sorry to read of not only the passing of your husband but the loss of your other family members too - just keep posting here whenever you feel the need to - it often helps just to put your 'musings' down in writing.

Wish I could say more to you.....

JW x

Hello everyone

I am so glad to have found this site, I never thought I would be able to talk aloud about how I feel and it's so good to know I can say what I feel with people really understanding how I feel, I think my family feel I should be on the mend, they are careful not to mention David when all I want to do is talk about him even if it does mean I end up in tears, I know I have a long way to go but you guys have too and are managing to get through your days if you can then surely so can I, I miss David, I always will, but logging on and seeing all your comments has helped me so much, i don't have to go home to a empty house any more because I do have people to talk to who know how I feel you have quite literally been a life line all of you thank you

Gina,
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss and how upset you are feeling.
I lost my mum 15 weeks ago and the feeling is awful as only someone who has been through can understand.
We are all on here for mutual support and it doesn't matter how good or bad a day has been for you, you can pour your feelings out on here and you're not completely alone.
Love to you and everyone else on here.
Louise x

Hi Gina
So sad to hear about your husband. I can understand fully how you feel having lost my husband last September.
It is very hard without them and feel free to write to us all on here anytime we are all waiting to help you.
Have you seen a counsellor I saw one when Paul died and found them very helpful.
We all know how each other is feeling on here and it does help to pour out your feelings and help ease the pain a bit.
I wish you comfort in the days ahead and some peace I am thinking of you. Take care my friend. Love to Louise, JW, Lynn, Derry and all other friends on this site.

Love Heather

Hello Gina,

I am so sorry that you have lost your husband and that you have had to move to the UK and make a new life for yourself, that must be really hard on you. Do you have family here? I really hope that you do.

I lost my own husband, very suddenly, 4 weeks ago so have a good idea of what you are going through. I have recently found a lovely photo of him and it is really helping me, it is such a good likeness that it makes me smile every time I catch sight of it, perhaps you could look through your photo's to find something similar. I know it doesn't help my children, they want me to take it down but am standing firm on this as it really has helped me.

Everyone on here has lost someone precious to them, so write in whenever you like and there will always be someone here to talk to and answer your posts.

Take it one day at a time, that's all you can do, don't think too far ahead at this sad time in your life.

Take care Gina,

luv Lynn. xx

Hello Lynn

Thank you so much for responding, it's so sad to hear of your loss and only 4 weeks ago, I do hope that this site is helping you, it has helped me so much, it's only my 2nd time to visit it, but seeing all the replys when I logged on made me feel that I was not alone, I do have family in the UK but I was really quite stupid as I set up home near my eldest son when most of my family and my youngest son live in manchester, I now wonder wether or not it would have been easier for me to have moved closer to the majority even though the scenery in northumberland is wonderful. I do have a picture of my David and like you I have it where I can see him, it's a very cheeky photo of him and it does make me smile, makes me miss him too but mainly I smile, take care Lynn I do know your pain and know one day it will lessen for both of us

XXX

Hello Heather

So sorry to hear about the sad loss of your hubby Paul, I do know how you feel and although I have thought about seeing a counselor I must admit I have not yet taken steps to see one, I hope you are surrounded with a wonderful family who can support you and help you through your days, I live close to my son but am too anxious to put too much on him,he's young and I think he desrves to get on with his life and be happy, I do feel a little better today, just knowing I can come home and talk to people has helped so thanks to everyone for the responses I can't tell you all how much they mean

Hi louise

So sorry to hear about your Mum, and thanks you so much for your thoughts, it does feel so much better knowing I can talk freely, it's the first time I have really said what I feel and I am so glad that the people on this site are so friendly and caring, I was dreading putting my thoughts on the internet they felt so private but I can see now that we all feel the same, it's a good feeling knowing that I can talk to you all thank you