I expect a lot of you are feeling the same as me but grief isa lonely thing. I see people everyday enjoying life and wish I could regain a tiny glimpse of that just now and again instead of this awful sadness and disinterest in everything.I wake up dreading the day ahead having nothing in my life but things i don't want to do and the worst thing is if i'm honest there is nothing left that sparks any motivativation in me without Jimmy all I do seems pointless. No-one there to share my thoughts and tell me everythings ok no comfort no sharing. NO-one to live for. Sounds very melodramatic but that is how life seems at this moment. Spend most of my time just thinking of the past surrounded by the most beautiful memories and wondering how I can possibly bear another day like this. But you do don't you? Keep hoping that tomorrow will be better and your loved one would not want to see you hurting. Just keep plodding on coping with changes you have to make when all you want is your safe little world back
Take care everyone
Sandi x

I do know what you mean by this feeling of hopelessness, and wishing for a past that can never be again. I stilll get these times, but I do know, for certain, that things will get better. I know that from my own experience, having got through the loss of our son, which was a dreadful experience, but we did survive it. Also, I have found that though it is not quite a year since Pat died, I have many more days when I am reasonably happy, even when I am alone. As you have probably learnt, I did find a new friend unexpectedly soon and that certainly helped, but even the days when I am alone I am getting a little back to a sort of normal life. Completely different, but liveable. I just thank heaven for the wonderful times Pat and I had together, and feel sorry for those who never had such times, or who have split up through divorce or something similar.
Please don't despair. It will get better, I know. Keep telling us your feelings and no doubt others will weigh in with encouragement.
My new friend, whos has been widowed for 23 years told me she got through it byt deliberately trying to help someone every day, even if it was only a kind word to a lonely old person in the street, and her positive attitude is helping me through.
Sorry if this is all a bit mixed up but email is never the same as real conversation. Do write me direct if you fell really sad, and I'll do what I can to share the pain.
Love, Derry