I am trying so hard to realise that Im not the only one suffering by the loss of my partner. His friends and family loved him so much - he was an extraordinary individual.
He died unexpectedly 2 weeks ago and I have kept really strong organising a fantastic funeral - which reflected his huge personality and capacity for love.
But now - I just cant stop crying - cant believe its happened and just keep asking - how did i get here in place of so much pain and belwilderment. I cant see any light at the end of the tunnel - and sometimes I feel selfish and have to realise that there are others suffering too.
He filled my life for two amazing years - we found each other after a long search with many other relationships on boths sides.

It was the kind of relationship that we both knew ought to be possible but i had given up on ever finding. I learned alot from him and I know i should really hang on to those precious things and carry outthe plans that we had made - but how do get to a place where i can think straight again.

I have always been in control of myself and have had a happy life mostly - this is like a train hitting me
Maybe I am rambling - I just am totally bewildered

Hi Audrey

I am so sorry for you. I know only too well that dreadful place you are in. Two weeks is a very short space of time - no time at all really and I wish there were words that I could say to help you. You are not alone. All of us on this site know how you are feeling and want to help you. What I keep saying to myself are words I read in a book - "our loved ones never leave us - they are always with us until we ourselves leave the physical plane and rejoin them in the spirit world." This made me feel a tiny bit comforted - to know that Sheila is with me all the time and knows what I am going through. Your partner knows what you are going through and he will comfort you through it and give you strength.

Love

Audrey

Hi Audery,
Iknow what you are going through....I lost my usband suddenly 9 weeks ago. I am still feeling bewildered and evrything feels surreal. The pain is unbearable and the ache in my heart is getting worse each daythat passes. I miss him so much and am overwhelmed with these feelings. We just have to get through each day one at a time. Take care.
jessie