Hi,

Please is there anyone who can help me?
I lost my mum to Cancer last week and the grief i feel is unbearable. She was only diagnosed in April this year and to lose her so quickly is a bit of a shock. I loved my mum very much, she was my best friend and we were extremely close, like twins. I feel so alone and empty. I cry each day and dread waking up each morning for another day to start. I have a brother and a niece but neither of them know how i feel because my brother never contacted my mum for eight years. My niece was taken out of our lifes when she was little and didn't regain contact until after 19 years so neither of them were that close to my mum.
If it wasn't for the wonderful support of my good friends then i really don't know waht i would have done. When is the pain going to go away, i just wish my mum was here.

Thanks
Ann

Dear Ann,
I'm so sorry to hear of you losing your Mum. I'm sure the pain does seem unbearable and I know bereavement is a very lonely feeling especially when you have family members who aren't as affected as you. There are many people on here who understand how you feel so keep visiting and I hope you find some comfort as I have. There are no easy answers - I'm still trusting time to be the best healer but it is tough.
Best wishes to you - try to stay strong, Ali.

Hi Ali,

Thank you for your reply. I know it is early days and i miss my mum so much. I am trying to stay strong and some days i feel a bit stronger than others and i just feel that my mum is giving me that bit of strength to get through it. The funeral is next week so i am trying to focus on hoping it all goes ok because unfortunately some of family are being a bit difficult at the moment which is what i don't need right now but it is nice to be able to vent how i feel on here knowing that there are people who understand how i feel and vise versa.

Thanks again x

Hi

I am so sorry to hear about your Mums death. I know how you are feeling at the moment because I lost my sister 5 months ago and like you we were so close. People took us for twins on several occasions. We were always together, holidayed together - the lot - so I know how you are missing you mum. Like you I have no family to belp me through. My nephew organised the funeral but I haven't seen him since then (18th March) and to talk to my sister in law I have to ring her - she never rings me even though they know I am now living on my own. So I know what you mean about family. Your friends will help you through just like mine did. What helped me was to make plans for every day for the week or longer ahead - go somewhere - meet someone - call on someone - anything to give you something else to think about for a few minutes. Join a club or a course or something. I am not an outging person - never went out from one end of the year to the other except with my sister, but I have been out every day for the last 20 weeks. Exhausting but it gets you through the days. This site, I think, is better than counselling because you can use it any time you feel in agony. With counsellors you have to wait for an appointment and sometimes you don't feel so bad at the time you are going to see them, but they can't see you when you DO need them. Just remember - it helps to know that everyone on this site knows and understands what you are going through and we all want to help you. It is still desperately early days for you but you will come through it.

Love

audrey