#328...I choose the second place to gain the first.
by
lesson #328 “I choose the second place to gain the first.”
(Taken from my achieves.)
It is really hard for me to understand
That I’ve lived my life upside down.
But I know that I have.
Clumsy, egoish, judgmentalish, grandiose.
Not knowing that I‘d never not been separated from God...
Now that it definitely upside down.
I love knowing that I’ve never been separated
From my dear heavenly Father.
Learning to hear the “Voice For God”
Was my biggest lifetime feat.
My “Only Ida” is:
“If only Ida started sooner.”
But whether I did or didn’t start sooner or did start later...
I got here and God did not click a stop watch on me...
It seems like Holy Spirt has had second place,
My goal is to take the second place
And give HolySpirit the first place in my life.
Gaining access to my mind that is part of God’s
Was quite a struggle.
Many’s the day I’d set there,
Pencil in hand
Paper laying there,
Eyes closed,
Centering with my calm,
And in ego would dart,
“You got eggs?”
Me: “OK, ego, I’ll write that down and deal with that later.”
Then back to taking another deep breath, holding it,
Blowing it out slowly, centering again with my calm,
And this time, interrupted with,
“Did you put toilet tissue on the holder?”
Me: “I’ll write that down and deal with that later, ego.”
(Of course I can not deal with the illusory ego.)
My first ventures with gaining ground
With hearing the Voice for God
Went much like that repetitiously for days,
Maybe weeks who kept count?
Not me.
Perseverance I know...
But it paid off with great rewards.
My still ongoing goal is
To release my desire for autonomy
My striving to remain separate
To cease seeing us with ego eyes.
To ‘visual eyes’ every one I meet.
I haven’t done this yet.
But this is the way in which
My salvation is obtained.
The course says:
“Yet all we find is sickness, suffering and loss and death.”
This is not what our Father wills for us,
Nor is there any second to His Will.
I still must join with God’s will to find my own
And when I get there
I will recognize it is Our will.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jesus says: “There is no will but Yours.”
And yes, there are still abiding contradictions
In this mind of rell’s.
And I do know that it is God’s Will
That I be wholly safe, eternally at peace.
And when I am in this eternal peace
I will share that Will with You.
***...rell
Posted on Jun 13, 2005, 11:23 AM from IP address 24.217.189.221