Monday...ACIM #22 “What I see is a form of vengeance.”
Posted May 31, 2004 1:00 PM
#22 “What I see is a form of vengeance.”
rell: This idea describes the way I had held attack thoughts in my mind.
This is how I saw the egoworld.
I did project my anger outward onto the world and everyone else.
Unknowingly, of course, as I would see vengeance about to strike me.
(I thought…)
Wouldn’t you?
I was perceiving my attack thoughts as lowerself defense.
It fast became a vicious circle…
Until I started looking at this book, these lessons
With the help of Holy Spirit and Jesus.
I have been given a way to see differently.
I had been preoccupying my mind with attacks
And even counter attack thoughts.
Now what kind of peace of mind is this?
The last few lessons showed me that a lot of my mind
Was devoted to savage fantasy…
I did not know this.
It was most joyous to hear that this is not real.
I was very happy to learn about my escape…
I felt much like Orr in “Catch-22” by Joseph Heller.
Always looking for a way out of my vicious circle.
All that I had learned to fear was not real!
I have learned how I had made it real to me.
Therefore, I have learned to unmake it. (p. 90 HolySpirit prayer.)
rell: I was the most angriest when I found out that I'd never been separated from God.
That I’d never been separated from God.
That I did not even know that I was God’s best friend.
I know this now.