Since my own personal hell is made of ice as opposed to brimstone... can't really argue

by Rick Astin

As the tinman's supporting leg buckles from the kick..Dulf drops to the canvas...grapevines the caught leg and begins to twist Astin's ankle with a force that only The White King could...

King: If you want to know how badly that hurts... picture this.. you're opening a pickle jar..

JR: What does a pickle jar have to do with this match?


King: Well you know how hard you force when you're opening a pickle jar right...you twist so hard that your hands go to red and eventually just from the force of trying to twist that sucker open...your palms get all sweaty and white...

JR: Well I do believe you've had sweaty palms before..

King: So you're there and you're running out of breath and just straining to get it open and your wife is yelling in your ear to give it up and let her try and you're all like "NO, I MUST PROVE MY MANLINESS" and continue twist and turn until finally you fall to the floor panting.."

JR: Is there a point to this?


King: Right...well imagine YOU'RE THE PICKLE JAR!!


JR: OH GOD NO!!


King: YES!


The mighty tinman is not feeling so mighty as he screams in agony...first he tries to roll out of it...but Kveldulf's grip proves resilient...holding onto that ankle like a dog with it's favorite chew toy....


Then Astin tries kicking dulf with his free leg....but despite all his maneuvering...he can't get a clean shot...


This agony can't go on much longer...something had to give....either Rick Astin would tap out...or his ankle would be torn right off his leg!


Raising his arm...it's all over...the strikezone GM just has to tap that canvas to be free of the pain...and then he does it.


HE REACHES HIS ARM OUT AND CATCHES THE BOTTOM ROPE!!


JR: OH MY!!


Yes the ref demands that Kveldulf release the hold...Dulf refuses..locking it in even tighter....the ref understands the adrenaline is pumping...but he does not back down..forcing Kveldulf to break the hold.


King: Remember that stuff about the pickle jar?


JR: Yes..


King: Well you know how after that whole ordeal...you are weeping on the kitchen floor...you've given it your all....there's just no way that pickle jar is opening..


JR: Yes...I've lived that moment myself.


King: Then your wife picks up the pickle jar...puts and elastic band around the lid...and just pops the sucker open like it were nothing.


JR: What...no...that's never happened to me -shifty eye...as opposed to shifty eyes due to JR's Bell's Palsy of course-


King: And you say...to defend your honor...I loosened it...


JR: -hangs head in shame-


King: That feeling right there....that's how Kveldulf is feeling after that ropebreak.


JR: -begins to cry-


Astin manages to pull himself to his feet...limping as he tries to put weight on his ankle again.....Kveldulf isn't about to let him recover though... The White King rushes the Tinman with his arms held high..ready to deliver a running double axehandle smash.....Only for Astin to drop to the floor while yanking on the top rope....sending Dulf careening out of the ring and slamming into the protective ring barrier....


Astin urges the ref to start the count...which he obliges....



ONE!!!



TWO!!!


but it seems the tinman changes his mind...shoving the ref back and shaking his head in disbelief....Astin begins to climb to the top turnbuckle...


JR: No!


ONE!!!


The tinman surveys the landscape....seeing a groggy Kveldulf getting to his feet....he goes for it!!


TWO!!!


Leaping from the ring...Astin's gaze soon turns to horror as he sees Kveldulf walk out of the way..


Astin: SHI...


The mighty tinman crashes through the barricade....knocking a few fans from their seats even...


THREE!!!


JR: Astin looks like he's been through a car wreck


King: That's why they call it high risk!


Dulf smiles as he moves in on his fallen opponent...grabbing the tinman by the neck....Astin provides no fight as Kveldulf lifts him from the carnage at their feet and drags him towards the ring...


FOUR!!!


As the confident White King raises the tinman to roll him in the ring...he's met by a surprise...


PEPSI MIST!!!


The tinman...despite being thrown for a loop after his aerial attack that was decidedly stupid in retrospect...managed to go with his base instinct...grabbing a fans cup of pepsi and taking a swig before Dulf was able to yank him from the carnage....


The ref is visibly angry...but hesitant to call for the bell...instead opting for a stern warning...which astin is to busy to bother with hearing...taking Dulf down with a DDT...there on the outside...on that thin protective matting covering the cement floor...

FIVE!!!


Make no mistake though...Astin was still hurting...and after delivering the DDT he was not so quick to return to his feet...


SIX!!


Yanking on the apron with all he's got...Astin tries desperately to get to his feet...


SEVEN!!


Alright...forget getting to his feet....just try to roll in the ring


EIGHT!!


Getting a knee up onto the apron...Astin starts crawling under the bottom rope...


NINE!!


HE MAKES IT!!


Sadly....unlike Astin....Kveldulf WAS at his feet by this point....and allowed Astin to enter the ring....only to grab him by his ankle again and yank him right out of the ring and to the floor.....starting the count all over again.


Stomping on the tinman's ankle...Dulf continues the punishment..not wanting the match to end in a count out however...he does eventually toss the tinman back into the ring...walking up the ring steps he leisurely re-enters the ring himself....ready for more...



    
This message has been edited by Astin on Jun 13, 2011 2:57 AM

Posted on Jun 13, 2011, 2:55 AM

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