Good morning Gerard

Hi Gerard
Remember Me? I'm the guy who volunteers at a horse ranch.We spoke at Kristies forum. I read your testimony and was not surprised. I don't believe this fear you have is from God.I have felt this because you never write the word God. It,s not uncommon. There are others who do the same.I read about it early in my search for the truth.I think God has sent me here to help you.Though I am not qualified. The Holy spirit in me is.You wrote
I admittedly have not answered this calling as I believe I should have....up to now. Part of the reason I spell G-d this way is I am so in fear I am using everything about Him in vain that I cannot risk offending Him further in using Him in MY vanity....I do not expect anyone to understand this....but I pray G-d does and knows my heart.The first thing you should know is God does love you. I did a study just on Gods love. Jesus payed the price.I will leave you with a sight it is a audio of this subject. called Gods kind of love.I hope it helps.

http://www.awmi.net/extra/audio/1055

http://www.awmi.net/extra/audio/1054

If I understand you and I think I do. You will throughly enjoy and ease your mind with these 13 teaching audio studies. Please let me know what you think and if you have any questions please ask.
In Gods Love
Jerry