Hey tulip...I am so happy that you got away from him and are on your own. I know what that feels like. When I got away from my abusive partner, I went wild because I had never experienced such freedom before. We too, had a child together and he always used him against me. You have to be strong though and know that, no matter what he says, you are in the right and things are better this way. You will have to explain to the child that his or her dad is just angry with you and that's why he says bad things about you. Be sure to let the child know that it is wrong to speak badly about someone just because you are upset. I wrote a book about my experiences. It was NOT easy! You can check it out on ebay if you like. I bet we have a lot in common! It is called Forced by Extremes. You can do an ebay search on the title and it will come right up. I wish you the best of luck. I know from experience that when one parent speaks badly of another, more often than not, I just felt resentment toward the bad-talker instead of being angry with the one who was being talked about. If that isn't happening now, it will probably happen in the long run so you won't have to worry about the child not liking you if you are not the one doing the bad-talking. Hope it all works out. I really think it will. You took the hardest step in leaving. If you can do that, you can do anything.
sincerely, amy lynn