Tonight I am at all time low. I have been crying my eyes out for the last half an hour.
So, Little Pea said she was too tired for her bath tonight and just wanted to lay in my bed and talk (it was 6pm). Long story short, she told me the perp abused the baby in front of her. I literally feel like I can't handle this anymore. I could barely deal when I thought it was a one time incident. I have been hanging by a thread since she told me it has been ongoing, prob her whole life from her description. And now she watched the baby get abused....I don't think I can survive this. You all said it would get worse, but I guess I didn't go there in my mind. Little Pea is a special child and always had huge potention. Now I just can't see it. I am not sure how these little ones can bear all of this and come out on the other side.
After she told me, she couldn't sleep. I sat on the mommy chair for two hours. Finally we went back down stairs to watch some tv. She finally fell asleep at 10:20. I am just holding my breathe for the first nightmare. I can't do this anymore. Both kids with swine, story continually getting worse, the sleep deprivation... What the F? I am a puddle on the floor.
not-so-Sunny
Posted on Nov 3, 2009, 8:12 PM from IP address 71.58.210.217