I'm the mother of a 41 year old daughter who was sexually abused more than 30 years ago. I recently wrote a book about my 30-year oddsey but it hasn't been published yet. It's so hard finding a publisher. I am thinking about a POD (print on demand) or an e-book. My book deals with mostly with myself as a wife, mother, a woman, and my struggle for healing and acceptance of the ills of incest and role I played in my daughter's pain. You see, I didn't believe her at first and that created issues in our relationship. My book also deals with how incest affected my daughter and other family members during adolescence and adulthood, decades after the initial abuse.
I am probably old enough to be your mothers so have dealt with my pain for a long time. I don't think it will ever go completely away. I believe I can be a help to many women like you who are wondering how you can make it through this. Right now most of you are putting your pain on the back burner and focusing most of your attention on your child. That's evident from the recommended books I see on the site. None of them are geared toward helping you ease "your" pain. Running in the background are your own emotional needs that aren't being addressed.
On faith in God. Focusing on God, attending church services, church social events, events with the children, and a full-time job kept me so busy that when I laid down at night, I was tired I went right to sleep. I say to you, keep busy and rest in God. See God as an anchor to hold onto, a strong tower, as a mother hen and yourself as a baby chick nestling under God's wings. Don't strive right now, just rest in God. Listen to hymns that speaks of God's love for you. God will guide you gently into healing when the time is appropriate and right for you. Trust God knows best.
Grandma
Posted on Nov 7, 2009, 12:28 PM from IP address 76.217.199.142