The Concept You have here is FINE, The
Difficulty will be putting your lyrics to
a Constant Melody, I Dont Think
You write Your Lyrics With A Melody
In Mind, And I May Add, You Are Not Alone On
This.
If You Look At The First Lines Of Your
Six Verses, Mark A Stress pattern Say On the
First Line Of Each Verse,And You Will Find
That No lines match, In It's Present
Form,We Are Talking About The Rythmn
Stress Of EachPhrase ,Because you have
placed Certain Stressed Words In The
Postitions They Are In,You have Dictated A Rythmn, That Is Not Constant.
It Is Not Difficult To Change , You Wont have
To Spoil the Storyline, And I Know You Are
Capable Of Doing It.
The Worst Example Is Lines Two Of The Second
And Third Verses. This Is Enough From Me,
I Do Think You Have The Capabilities To Become
A Very Good Songwriter, I Hope That Does Not
Sound Too Condescending.
Best Wishes With Your Writing
Peter Kristian
Posted on Mar 8, 2000, 2:54 PM from IP address 213.36.45.48