Critique

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Sharon,
Like this, but you know I can't resist condensing! Sweep or keep what you like. Good luck with it.

V1:
As I rise alone with the morning sun
(I'm--delete) thinking of (our--replace--the) new life (we have--condense--we've) begun
(I--delete) can't wait to hold you, (as--delete) my new love
and (tell you,--condense--say)I love you,just because

Chorus:
Today we'll vow,to join our hearts as one
rise early together,with the morning sun
In our hearts,we'll leave no room for doubt
'cause our love is strong enough
Today we'll vow

V2:
From the first moment,you captured my eyes
I felt my broken heart,come back to life
you are the reason,this man is complete
I'll hold this gift forever,today waiting for me

Chorus Repeat:

V3:
As you stand here before me,as my new bride
I promise to love you,(until my last breath inside--replace--'til the day I die)
I want you to know,that my love (will be--replace--is) true
all my life I have waited,(waiting--delete) for you

Chorus Repeat:

Bridge:
(I know--delete) I saw (heaven --replace--Heaven on earth)when we said I do
(I know He--replace--God) (has--delete) blessed my life
when He gave me you



Posted on Mar 15, 2000, 2:23 PM
from IP address 206.65.216.30


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