More polishing needed

by

 

Hey Dale,

I feel for you if this is personal.
I agree that additional polishing could go along way. First verse has to many days, scattered through it. Wanted to know more about the little girl before the passing of her Mom. Perhaps revise the opening verse, and make us relate to the little girl, before swallowing the death of her Mom. Good luck with it. Colleen



Posted on Mar 24, 2000, 7:20 AM
from IP address 209.240.216.66


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