An Alka-Seltzer lyric -- "Road Goes On" -- critiqued
by
Now, I'm not calling this an Alka-Seltzer lyric because it gives me heartburn. It's a metaphor of my own, since you seem to favor them ... you start out with very *specific*, physical images -- giving the character a name (for what reason I'm not sure), Pennsylvania country, Greyhoud busses, San Fransisco ... suitcases and window seats.
But then the whole thing, like an Alka-Seltzer tablet, fizzes and dissolves away into generalizations . It's jarring -- mixing the two as you have. It's like playing a CD with a scratch in it, that jumps from halfway into Track 1 to some point halfway into Track 2.
This is aggravated by the switch from 3rd person to 2nd person plural -- sure I get the point that this Billy is some sort of "Everyman" -- but that connection is going to have to be made more effectively than just throwing in the "we are all together" line.
If this were my song -- I'd either rewrite the opening sections to make them less specific and more general -- or I'd rewrite the ending to some sort of more specific, meaningful conclusion.
Don Rowe
Posted on Apr 10, 2000, 1:38 PM from IP address 209.145.177.122