This song has some decent imagery which your other songs seem to lack, but overall, this doesn't really jell like it should.
My biggest problem is that hearing someone's heart calling implies that they are far away, but the verses indicate she is right next to you. But also, there are some amateurish (JMHO) rhymes, like "soft and fair" and "love from me, my dear." Also, each of your verses has its own rhyme scheme. Perhaps the music makes that make more sense, though.
Well, that's my first impressions. See what others think, but do keep at it!
Posted on May 25, 2000, 4:09 PM from IP address 136.2.1.101
