this just plain sucks, doesn't it?! it is just so hard to keep marching on and to know what to do next. i just got my negative beta today and am so bummed out. it is so hard to give yourself the space to be upset, while knowing that negativity can't help. i really struggle with this. wanting to just drop into a heap on the floor and weep and lash out vs. jumping into action to plan for the next cycle. it is simply crazy making. it takes a lot to keep it together. i often think that surely i can't take it anymore, not even one more cycle, only to fear that the next cycle could be the one and i gave up too soon. what a mind bender. my mind is thoroughly bent!
i don't have any advice, just wanted to be another voice to remind you that you are not alone. anyway, it sounds like you are feeling a little better and i'm glad to hear it. i hope you enjoyed your dinner.