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yah, i understand where you are coming from. but just know this; this board is a tiny microcosm of the outer world. most women in their 40's are no longer trying or they are having abortions. we are all here because we are having trouble. it's not a true sampling.
...and not all of the 300 million are female and over 40.
i like the saying 'pessimism is the domain of the informed' but as a Christian i see miracles all the time.
i know you are a pessimist BD, but negative thinking is not going to help. when i was young, if i got really stressed my period would start, if i got upset or nervous my stomach would start hurting and i would race to the loo. so i can't help but think that if we flood our system with nothing but negative thoughts, it will express itself in a physical way.
that's why it's so important to get a neutral doctor who believes in your mission. you don't need more negative vibes than the ones you are giving yourself.